But it has me lifting my hand, and more tears fall from her eyes as she quickly, almost desperately accepts, as if she were hoping for exactly that.
She clenches my fingers tightly, and each of us linked together in a line, the others slowly shuffling in behind us. We head for the arch of the hill that overlooks the Garden of Valor, where our friend will be laid to rest.
I learned a lot from the tragedy we’re facing today.
Love isn’t the sole driving force behind our pain. It can add to it, yes, but our pain comes from within. Sometimes it’s placed there from experience and other times, some of us have a dark place within us that, no matter what we do, who we have, and how we live, the light never quite reaches it.
Nobody can claim to understand the way one feels, because the reality is, we all feel differently.
We can live through the same exact moments, even side by side, but we don’t experience them the same.
I can only hope for the opportunity to hold someone up who feels they can no longer hold themselves up.
I look along the masses and slowly lower into one of the seats along the front row.
Soft music begins to play in the background, and the celebrant takes his place at the podium.
It’s a beautiful, devastating morning in Corona Del Mar.
A steaming latte with the lid off and fresh whipped cream added is placed on the railing in front of me, letting me know Ransom is back from his meeting with Sienna’s case manager.
With a soft smile, I turn to look at him, and he glides his knuckles along my jawline, slowly tipping my head back.
“You okay?” he whispers.
I nod. “Yeah, I am.”
His eyes search mine and a small frown finds its way along his forehead. “With everything, not just today?”
A low sigh leaves me, but it’s the good kind.
It’s been six days since my mom was carted off in handcuffs, two since Anthony followed suit, granted my mother was already sitting plush in a hotel a city over with the promise not to leave town by the time his black and white ride arrived.
It’s been a marathon ever since.
My dad, with the help of one of his judge buddies who ‘owed him one,’ had Sienna’s new guardianship paperwork, naming Ransom in control, expedited, so there would be no lapse in her care.
Monti and I did what she said and went to the bank, claimed our rightful trusts, and officially broke all ties to our mother in that regard.
With Monti’s approval, the boys moved in, Ransom in my room, the other two into one of the guest rooms down the hall.
It’s not forever, but temporary.
This is our temporary home until we figure out what to do and where to go from here.
“You didn’t have to do this, you know.” His face caves. “Not for me. We would have found another way.”
“There was no other way,” I whisper, and then grin. “And I didn’t do it for you.”
A small chuckle slips past his lips, and he cocks a brow, slipping closer, a soft, low, “Oh, no?” following.
“No.” I push up onto my knees, bringing myself closer to him and glide my lips along his. “I did it for me. I did it so I could have all the things I want, like a true ...spoiled little rich girl,” I tease, cupping his cheeks, and holding his eyes on mine.
His lips hook in the corner and I place a small kiss there.
“I did it because I love you.”
Ransom’s muscles lock, his jaw clenching beneath my palms.
“And I want you to teach me how to love you right.”
He smashes his mouth to mine, bruising and biting. Panting.
When he pulls away, his forehead falls on mine, our gazes locked.
“There is no right, baby. No wrong.” He brushes my hair from my face. “Just us.”
“I like us,” I breathe.
“I know,” he teases. “I love you, Jameson.”
“I know,” I whisper back, making him chuckle.
“You ready to light up the night?” he asks.
I nod, and he tugs me to my feet, grabbing my coffee with his free hand. “Let’s do this.”
Together, we join the others out front, and we’re slipping inside Arsen’s car the moment the moon reaches its peak.
I look to Ransom, and he sits back, allowing me to climb into his lap.
The top is down, the wind whipping my hair in both our faces, but I don’t care.
I hold his face, my lips twitching when his hands come up to do the same to mine.
“You know how I said I did what I did so I can have all the things I want?” I ask, and he nods. “What I wanted most was for you to have all the things you wanted, which, thankfully, included me. So, it was a win-win on my side.”