Lann tilted Kat’s head back to kiss her nose. He’d always been generous with his physical caresses, and the truth was, she couldn’t get enough. Love or not, she needed his hands and his lips like she needed air.
Kat and Lann returned with too many parcels. There was no way she could work her way through that many outfits. Lann had insisted on buying her a full maternity wardrobe to cater for every month of her pregnancy. She’d argued at first, and when it had gotten too tiresome, she’d given up.
Shopping with Lann was tiring work. After a long nap, she woke up in the bedroom alone and went in search of the others. She found Clelia in the entrance, replacing the candles.
“Hey, Clelia,” she said. “Where’s everyone?”
“Eve is in the lab, and Lann and Joss are in the study. Do you feel rested?”
Kat nodded. “Much better, thank you.”
“I was just about to feed the animals and walk the dogs. Would you like to join me?”
“I’d love to.”
They put on their coats and scarves, and went out back to an animal shelter to feed abandoned and orphaned rabbits, hedgehogs, turtles, and cats. When the task was done, Clelia called the wolfdogs and took a trail that went through the surrounding forest.
The day was cold and misty. Kat wound her scarf around her neck. “May I ask you something, Clelia?”
The tiny woman shoved her hands into the pockets of her coat. “Of course.”
“Do you or Joss possess any of the seven forbidden arts?”
Clelia stopped to look at Kat. “Why do you ask?”
“I saw the way you reacted in the kitchen this morning, and I was just wondering.”
The expression in Clelia’s eyes turned sad. “It’s me,” she said in a miserable tone. “It’s because of me we can’t.”
Kat hooked her arm through Clelia’s. “I’m sorry.” The dogs ran ahead of them as they resumed their walking. “I didn’t mean to pry, but I know it must be hard for you, having me around.”
“No, we’re happy to have you, but I’m sad for Joss. I know how badly he wants a child.” She looked at her boots. “As do I.”
“Maybe Eve will find a cure,” Kat said, hopeful.
Clelia stopped again. “Oh, Kat. It’s me who’s sorry.”
Kat smiled. “It’s all right.”
“How can you be so accepting?”
They neared a fallen trunk and sat down. “When Lann told me he was taking me to the clinic, I thought I’d go through with it, but I just couldn’t. The way I look at it is that I can either accept the inevitable and make the most of the time left, or be angry and make myself miserable.”
“Lann blames himself.”
“It’s not like he planned it.”
Clelia took Kat’s hand. “You’re a courageous woman.”
“Not at all.” She looked at Clelia. “It’s Lann I’m really worried about.”
“You love him, don’t you?”
“I do.”
“Then why do you seem so sad when you say it?” Clelia asked.
“Because a selfish part of me wants him to love me like Joss loves you.” She shrugged. “I’ve accepted the fact that he’s here because of the situation, and not because of me.”
Clelia gasped. “Oh, Kat. That’s not true. It’s obvious that he loves you.”
Kat shook her head and stared at her feet. “He offered me a thirty-day fling. It was never meant to go this far. He even admitted that he wouldn’t have come back to me if I weren’t pregnant.”
“Ask him,” Clelia urged. “Ask him how he feels.”
“He told me he loved me.”
“Don’t you believe him?”
“What else can he say? Wouldn’t you, if you were in his shoes?”
Clelia let go of Kat’s hand to throw an arm around her shoulder. “I’m sure he means it. Lann isn’t the kind of person who’d lie just to make someone feel better.”
“Anyway, as I said, that’s just the selfish part of me speaking. It’s better that he doesn’t love me. I don’t want him to suffer when I’m gone.”
Clelia hugged her tightly.
Talking about dying was too sad. Kat didn’t want to spoil the mood for everyone in the castle. “So, what’s your gift?” she asked to change the subject.
“Fire.”
“Fire?”
“I’m a Firestarter,” Clelia said
Kat was speechless.
“I didn’t know myself until a couple of months ago,” Clelia continued. “It’s still new to me too.”
“Sometimes I think this is all a dream.”
“Sometimes, so do I.” Clelia patted her arm. “Come on. It’s getting dark. Let’s finish the walk and go back to the fire where it’s warm.”
When Clelia got up, Kat held her back. “I know we don’t know each other, but you’re Lann’s friend. Will you make sure he’s all right, when … you know?”
Clelia stared at Kat with misty eyes. “Of course.” She paused. “Have you talked about your baby’s future?”
“Not yet,” Kat said. “I’m not sure Lann is ready.”
“Speak to him,” Clelia said. “It must be weighing on your mind.”