‘On yours—on yours!’
‘Then do what I ask.’
‘It’s impossible!’
‘No, it’s not impossible. Think, Lennox, we could have children…’
‘Mother wants us to have children. She has said so.’
‘I know, but I won’t bring children into the world to live in the shadow you have all been brought up in. Your mother can influence you, but she’s no power over me.’
Lennox murmured: ‘You make her angry sometimes, Nadine; it isn’t wise.’
‘She is only angry because she knows that she can’t influence my mind or dictate my thoughts!’
‘I know you are always polite and gentle with her. You’re wonderful. You’re too good for me. You always have been. When you said you would marry me it was like an unbelievable dream.’
Nadine said quietly: ‘I was wrong to marry you.’
Lennox said hopelessly: ‘Yes, you were wrong.’
‘You don’t understand. What I mean is that if I had gone away then and asked you to follow me you would have done so. Yes, I really believe you would…I was not clever enough then to understand your mother and what she wanted.’
She paused, then she said: ‘You refuse to come away? Well, I can’t make you. But I am free to go! I think—I think I shall go…’
He stared up at her incredulously. For the first time his reply came quickly, as though at last the sluggish current of his thoughts was accelerated. He stammered: ‘But—but—you can’t do that. Mother—Mother woul
d never hear of it.’
‘She couldn’t stop me.’
‘You’ve no money.’
‘I could make, borrow, beg or steal it. Understand, Lennox, your mother has no power over me! I can go or stay at my will. I am beginning to feel that I have borne this life long enough.’
‘Nadine—don’t leave me—don’t leave me…’
She looked at him thoughtfully—quietly—with an inscrutable expression.
‘Don’t leave me, Nadine.’
He spoke like a child. She turned her head away, so that he should not see the sudden pain in her eyes.
She knelt down beside him.
‘Then come with me. Come with me! You can. Indeed you can if you only will!’
He shrank back from her.
‘I can’t. I can’t, I tell you. I haven’t—God help me—I haven’t the courage…’
Chapter 9
Dr Gerard walked into the office of Messrs Castle, the tourist agents, and found Sarah King at the counter.
She looked up.
‘Oh, good morning. I’m fixing up my tour to Petra. I’ve just heard you are going after all.’