“Good evening, William.” I can’t stop the sarcastic way I say his name now. It’s like a little paper cut each time I say it, and I want him to know this. Or maybe I just want a reaction from him. Something. Anything to get a little bit of his attention. I see the tic in his jaw, and I can’t help but smirk at my little victory.
“So glad you could pull yourself away from whatever it is you’re up to these days to come to my little graduation party. God knows you don’t come around to see us anymore.” Cheese and crackers! That came out way whinier than I intended it to. I’ve never actually seen William with another woman, but I can’t help the thought that that’s what’s been keeping him away from us…from me. The very idea slices through my heart.
“We all have lives, Haley. Like your father keeps saying, you’re a big girl now and it’s time you started acting like it.”
My shoulders drop at his words. There it is again, I’m a big girl now.
Softly, I whisper, “Maybe I don’t want to be a big girl.”
He mumbles something I don’t quite catch, and the temperature in the room seems to rise.
“Fuck, Haley, I can’t deal with this right now. Get your little ass wherever you were going.”
I feel the lump rise in my throat, but I can’t let him see how he’s affected me.
“Then why don’t you move your stupid face away from the door!” I scream at him.
Hopefully the anger will keep the tears at bay for a few moments longer until I can make my escape.
“Now, now, Haley, don’t you go thinking you’re too old to be bent over and have your panties pulled down for me to spank that sweet little ass of yours.”
I can’t control the gasp that leaves my lips. How dare he!
That helps push those tears back, and I feel my anger grow. He has ignored me for the past year and now he thinks he can just come in here and boss me around? I don’t think so, Daddy William. I straighten my back, trying to make myself somewhat taller, but he’s got a whole foot on me, so I’m not sure it’s working
“I’d like to see you try…Daddy William.” No sooner have the words left my lips than he grabs me by the waist, turns me around and pushes me against the door.
I snap my face up to look at him through the veil of my lashes. The look on his face is one I’ve never seen before. His eyes seem to change in the light, to the deepest green I’ve ever seen. He slides one of his legs between mine, bracing his left hand next to my face and his right on my hip, making it so I have no escape. I’m totally trapped. He wouldn’t hurt me, would he? The hand he has on my hip tightens, causing a sharp pain that seems to go right to my core. Oh God, the tingling between my legs is back in a way that I’ve never felt before. I swear I can feel my pulse down there, and I feel liquid leak from my girly parts. I’ve never had a boy—no, a man—on me like this before.
The only experience I have is the one time my best friend Molly talked me into going to her brother’s basketball game. Molly is boy crazy, and being as we went to a private all-girls’ Catholic school, we never got to be around boys. After the game, her brother Tim caught me by the bleachers and tried sticking his slimy tongue down my throat, which was completely gross. When I came home and told my father about it he hit the roof and started making me get birth control shots from the doctor. I tried to explain, but he was too freaked out to listen. Luckily, I didn’t tell him it was Molly’s brother, or he probably wouldn’t have let me hang out at her house anymore.
This moment, however, isn’t gross at all. What would he do if I moved so my girly parts sat right on his thigh? Would he feel the wetness? Would he notice it if I just moved back and forth a little? Why do I want to move back and forth? What good will it do? But I want to. I have to.
I see his eyes drop to my lips. I bet William’s kiss would be nothing like Tim’s. I lick my lips, wondering if he’ll do it. Kiss me, I beg with my eyes, knowing there’s no way I can say the words.
William starts to lean towards me, and I freeze. He’s going to kiss me, but right before he gets to my lips his face turns and he buries it in my neck. I feel something warm and slick slide up my neck and a moan slips from my lips. He licked me. Oh my God, he totally licked me!
“You taste like pure innocence,” he tells me. At his words, I let my girl parts slide down his thigh. The pressure feels so good. It feels like something is building. Something is going to happen…
“Haley!” I hear my father yell.
The next thing I know I’m standing, and William is across the room, leaning against the wall like nothing happened. Is he that unaffected by me? The very idea crushes me, but who am I kidding? I haven’t the first idea how to attract a man like William.
Maybe my fantasies are starting to make me go crazy. Maybe I imagined everything that just happened. It wouldn’t be the first time I’ve had vivid thoughts about William, and I’m sure it won’t be the last. I just can’t seem to shake him from my head. He dominates my every thought, and maybe even owns them. What would it be like to be owned by William? The idea should scare me, but it only excites me.
“Haley, there you are,” my father says, breaking me from my thoughts.