Just as he’d done when he left to kill the Queen and King of Solis.
And that meant that Casteel truly understood the likelihood that Spessa’s End wouldn’t hold until or if reinforcements arrived.
“You took an oath to protect me, and you will,” Casteel said. “You’re not running away from the battle. You will be keeping safe what is most important to me, and that is Poppy.”
I jolted. “Wait. What?”
“You will leave with them. It will be hard,” he said, still holding Kieran’s gaze. “There will be no breaks, and you will need to listen to everything Kieran tells you, especially when it’s night in the mountains, but—”
“I’m not leaving,” I cut him off.
“You can’t be here,” Casteel replied. “Not when they come. This is not up for discussion.”
I shot to my feet. “Let me make one thing clear. I don’t know if you realize this or not, Casteel, but I’m not duty-bound to obey a single thing you say.”
Casteel stiffened.
“And maybe you should actually look at me when you try to order me to do things,” I tacked on.
He turned to me, his head cocked. “I’m looking at you now.”
“But are you listening?”
“Oh, man,” Delano murmured under his breath as the rest of the room went dead silent. “Someone is getting stabbed again.”
Someone, I think it was Jasper, snorted.
“Oh, I’m listening,” Casteel replied. “Maybe you should try that. Along with this thing called common sense.”
“Definitely getting stabbed,” Kieran confirmed.
I stepped around the table, aware that Delano appeared to be sinking into his chair. “Are you serious?”
“Are you armed?” Casteel asked with a smirk. “You are, aren’t you?”
“I’m so confused by what is happening here,” Nova whispered with a slight frown.
“Apparently, she already stabbed him once,” Jasper informed the Guardian. “In the heart.”
Nova looked at me.
“And she cut me earlier tonight. Threw a knife right at my face another time,” Casteel ticked off his fingers. “Then this one time, in the woods, she—”
“No one wants to hear about how many times I’ve made you bleed,” I snapped.
“I do,” Jasper remarked.
Emil raised his hand. “So do I.”
“Look, not only is it not wise for the one thing they want to be here within their grasp, I don’t want to worry about you handing yourself over,” Casteel stated. “You know…like before.”
“That is not a mistake I will make again,” I stated.
“But you were just thinking about it, weren’t you?” He stepped to the side so Delano was no longer seated between us.
“I was,” I admitted. “For a couple of minutes. But you were right.”
His brows lifted. “Blessed be the gods, someone mark the date and time. She just admitted I was right.”
“Oh, shut up,” I bit back.
“Fine with me. Conversation is over. You’ll leave with Alastir and Kieran immediately.” He started to turn.
“I am not leaving.” I lifted my chin when he spun back to me. “You’ll have to make me. You’ll have to drag me all the way to Atlantia yourself.”
His chin dipped as anger pounded through him, reaching me. “Or I could just compel you.”
My skin went cold. “You wouldn’t dare.”
His jaw flexed, and then he spat out a curse. The ice left me. He wouldn’t do that. “This is different, Poppy. Different than the Rise or the Craven or the Dead Bones Clan.”
“You should leave,” the Guardian spoke. “I saw what you can do—out there with Delano. But that will be of no use when it’s time to fight. You will be nothing but a distraction to our Prince. You will be a liability.”
Slowly, I turned to the woman. “Excuse me?”
Nova stared back at me. “I mean no offense. I’m only stating facts.”
“Your facts are grossly incorrect,” I told her. “Just to point out the most obvious of your inaccuracies, what I did for Delano would actually come in handy when and if people are injured. That,”—I sent a dark look in Casteel’s direction—“is common sense.”
Her eyes narrowed.
“As far as me being a liability? I’m just as good with a sword as I am with a bow, and I’m damn good with a bow. Probably better than most here. I am an asset,” I said. “And as far as being a distraction to Casteel, that’s his weakness. Not mine.”
Nova’s chin lifted, and I felt…I felt a measure of respect from the Guardian. It was buried under layers of wariness, but it was there.
“She’s not lying,” Casteel said, watching me. “Penellaphe can fight, and her skill with a sword and aim with the arrow are leagues above that of a trained soldier. She is never a liability.”
My gaze shifted to him. “So then it’s settled?”
His lips thinned as he shook his head.
“You need my help,” I told him, drawing in a shallow breath. “And I need to be here. They are coming for me, and I have to be able to do something. I need to fight back, not stand by and do nothing.”
Casteel’s eyes met mine and stayed, and I thought maybe he understood then. Why I couldn’t walk away. Why doing so would make me feel helpless. But even then, I braced for more of a fight. Because this was different. This was battle, and I could feel the mess of emotions in him. The conflict.
But then he nodded. “Okay. You stay,” he said, and I breathed out a sigh of relief. “We’ll discuss what exactly that means later.”
My eyes narrowed.
“What of me?” Kieran demanded then. “If Penellaphe is staying—”
“There still needs to be two of you,” Casteel interrupted, and I sensed the bone-deep weariness in him. “Delano can’t make the trip, and you’re faster than Naill and most Atlantians here.”
Kieran stiffened while his father watched on in silence. “And this is an order?”
Meeting Kieran’s eyes, Casteel nodded. “Yes. It is.”
The wolven’s jaw worked so hard, I was surprised we didn’t hear it crack. He shook his head. Disbelief and anger radiated from him, but I felt something else, something deeper that was warm and stronger than the anger. “I know why you’re doing this,” Kieran whispered.
Casteel said nothing for a long moment and then said, “It’s not the only reason.”
Words went unsaid between them, but were understood nonetheless. Whatever it was caused Kieran to nod, to accept Casteel’s order. Then Kieran moved forward, clasping Casteel around the back of the neck. “If you get yourself killed,” Kieran said, “I’m going to be pissed.”
One side of Casteel’s lips kicked up. “I won’t fall, my brother.” Casteel pulled him in for a tight, one-armed hug. “That, I can promise you.”
Exhaling raggedly, Kieran returned the embrace. Maybe I was just tired. I didn’t know, but I wanted to cry as I watched them, even though I wouldn’t let myself consider the possibility that they would not see each other again. That their bond could be severed. Kieran stepped back, looking at his father.
Jasper was already on his feet, moving to his son. “I’ve always been proud of you.” He curved a hand around the back of Kieran’s head. “I’ve always had confidence in you. I know we will see each other again.”
Kieran nodded, and as he pulled away from his father, I took a tentative step forward. “Kieran?”
He looked at me.
“Please…please try to be careful,” I said.
He lifted his brows. “Are you worried about me?”
Crossing my arms, I nodded.
“Don’t be nice to me,” he replied, and I sensed amusement from him. “It weirds me out.”
“Sorry.”
He smiled then as he walked to where I stood. “You don’t sound remotely sorry.”
I grinned at him.
“Do me a favor,” Kieran said, looking down at me. “Protect your Prince, Poppy.”
I didn’t see Casteel for the rest of the day.
After saying goodbye to Alastir, I returned to the room while he left to go and speak with the people of Spessa’s End. I’d started to ask to go with him, but upon remembering the townspeople’s reactions the night before, I realized I would only be a distraction. The kind that could prove deadly to the people of Spessa’s End if they were busy staring at me instead of listening to Casteel.
I’d expected him to return, not so much to finish our conversation since there were far more important things going on, but because he needed to sleep.
But the morning gave way to the afternoon, and Casteel still didn’t show. I didn’t stay in the room. I prepared.
Luckily, Vonetta had been near when I stepped out into the courtyard, and she was willing to indulge me in a training session. Handling a sword or a bow wasn’t a technique you forgot, but it was one that could become rusty with neglect.
Plus, she was a wolven, faster and stronger than a mortal, and fighting her would be a lot like fighting a knight. I needed the practice.
We drew a bit of a crowd, but Casteel was still with the people. According to Vonetta, he was helping to determine who could fight.
When I saw Casteel again, it was when Delano brought me to the small room off the dining room where dinner was spent discussing strategies. The fact that Casteel had thought to include me in the meeting didn’t go unnoticed by me or by anyone else in the room.
By the time night arrived, and I’d returned to the bedchamber, Casteel still hadn’t. I spent several hours nervously pacing and thinking about things—about everything that had happened before Casteel entered my life, and everything that had happened since. I thought about my gift—how it was changing, how I glowed like moonlight. And I thought about all that Casteel had said and what had been left unsaid.