I feel like time is skipping. Like I’m losing hundreds of seconds at a time. Jumping from minute to minute like a stuttering old movie. Then Cort is dragging the needle across a finger on his left hand and I’m mesmerized by this. I watch, line by black line, as the image takes shape.
A skeleton key.
But that’s when I notice all his fingers have keys on them. I get lost in that too, watching them dance as he draws and wondering… what the fuck do they open?
Then his buzzing stops, but Rainer’s buzzing continues, and Cort is flashing his finger-keys in my face.
It’s a sign.
The little boy is suddenly in front of me. “He wants to know where you want it.” And his words come out slow and… shimmery. Like… waves of words. I want to laugh again. I can’t tell if I do it out loud or just in my head.
Where I want what? That’s my mind talking, not my lips. My lips don’t talk. Not even the Lectra can make them talk.
Plus, I’m so fucking high right now, I don’t even remember how to talk. I couldn’t form the words if I wanted to.
“Never mind her,” the boy says. “Do me.”
I gasp before I can stop myself. And grab his arm. No! No! Do not let him mark you, beautiful little boy!
But Maart, who is behind me—or… no. I’m like… in his lap?—he pulls me back and I don’t have it in me to resist. So I’m lying back on his chest and Cort has my foot in his hand and—
I kick and wiggle, because it tickles. I laugh again. This time, I’m very sure the laugh escapes.
This makes Rainer stop and smile at me. Next thing I know, he’s looking back down at his work on Cort’s ribcage and Cort is dragging his needle over my baby toe.
Then everyone is laughing. Maybe even I’m laughing? But I don’t know what’s funny.
Cort bends my knee and holds my pinky toe between his fingers, presenting it to me like something special and precious. They laugh again.
I have to squint to make out the shape. But it’s moving all over the place like it doesn’t want to be seen. So I give up and just shut my eyes with a long, audible sigh.
And that’s three times that I know of. Three times I have made noises tonight.
I don’t make noises.
Then the boy—Evard. His name is Evard, I remind myself—he’s hissing, and moaning, and wincing, so I open my eyes to find Cort dragging a needle over the back of his neck.
But I can’t keep my eyes open long enough to see the artwork, and then I just give in to the Lectra completely, my mind spinning as I breathe to the beat of Maart’s heart, which is pounding against my back.
I am fucked up.
Maart’s fingers are caressing a long, lazy pattern up and down the side of my thigh. I open my eyes again and find Rainer is done now and Evard is whining and complaining. Rainer drags him towards an open door on the other side of the room and pushes him through, closing the door, locking it with a loud click, as he turns back to us.
His grassy eyes find mine. And then he crosses the room with a smile and kneels in front of me. Right between my legs.
Then two hands that belong to two different people open my legs up and Rainer lifts the skirt of my white dress up and out of the way.
I catch one more look at those bright green eyes and then he dips his head down and begins to lick me.
CHAPTER SIX - CORT
Anya’s entire body bucks up when Rainer licks her. She gasps, and I already know that making that little noise bothers her. Her silence goes way beyond not talking. She does not want to make any sound at all. Not a sigh, not a groan, and certainly not a moan.
Good luck with that, Anya. Good luck with that when Rainer’s mouth is between your legs. When his tongue is working its magic against your pretty little nub.
She hasn’t got a chance.
Rainer pauses and I grin at him. It has been a long time since we’ve done this and I suddenly feel great.
Last fight. Last fucking fight and I made it.
I’m done. We’re done.
And after we finish celebrating here tonight I have just one more training camp and I will have earned out. I will have bought my freedom. And I will be able to take Evard, Rainer, and Maart with me.
Do I feel a little guilty about leaving the others behind? Of course. But I gave up trying to save the world a long time ago.
Saving everyone would mean a dozen more fights. At least. And if there’s one thing I’ve learned about being on top it’s this: Someone is always coming up trying to take your place and the best time to quit is when you’re ahead.