Holly’s mouth twisted. ‘No one’s ever done that for me, or at least, not for a long time.’
Julius squeezed the tops of her shoulders. ‘Then it’s about time somebody did.’
Her eyes flicked away from his. ‘It’s nice of you and all that, but I’d hate for you to be estranged from your mother just because of me. It’s not like I’m even going to be here much longer.’
Julius hated being reminded of the timeline. It was getting closer and closer to the end, and he knew he had to face it, but it was like facing a yawning chasm. Once Holly left, his life would go back to normal. Normal and ordered and...empty. ‘What if you stayed a little longer?’
Her gaze was suddenly wary. Guarded. ‘Why would I want to do that?’
Why indeed? he thought with a stab of disappointment. Clearly he was the one with the larger emotional investment in their relationship. Emotional investment? What the hell did that even mean? He wasn’t in love with her. Was he? No. Of course he wasn’t. He just had feelings for her. Feelings that were about care and concern for her welfare. Affection. She was a sweet girl underneath that fa?ade. He’d come to respect her. To admire her. He’d come to enjoy their relationship.
Why was he persisting in calling it a relationship? It was a fling...wasn’t it? Why had he been so convinced she was developing feelings for him? He’d fooled himself their love-making had made her fall in love with him. But sex was just sex for her. Hadn’t she told him that repeatedly? The ironic thing was he’d said the same thing to women he’d dated in the past.
Julius shrugged. ‘Just thought you might like to come out to the desert with me.’
Her brow wrinkled like crushed silk. ‘The...desert?’
‘I’m going on a trip to check on the software in the Atacama Desert,’ he said. ‘It’s the highest and driest desert on the planet—that’s why we do the infrared astronomy there, because of the absence of water vapour. I thought you might like to come with me.’
She pulled half of her bottom lip inside her mouth before releasing it. ‘Look, it’s a really nice offer, but I’ve already booked my air fare and I don’t want to be charged a rebooking fee.’
‘Don’t worry about the money. I can help you with that.’
Her eyes met his with the kind of implacability and pride he had come to associate with her. And admire. ‘It’s not about the money. I’ve made up my mind, Julius. I’m leaving at the end of the week. I’ve waited years for this. You can’t ask me to change my plans just because you want to have another week or two of sex.’
‘It’s not about the sex, damn it,’ Julius said.
Her chin came up. ‘Then what is it about?’
He framed her face in his hands. He felt as if he was stepping into mid-air off a vertiginous cliff. His stomach was pitching. Her eyes were giving nothing away but he could see a tiny muscle near her mouth moving like a pulse. ‘It’s about you. About wanting to be with you. Not because of the sex, although that’s great. The best, in fact. But because I like you.’
Her eyes took on a cynical sheen. ‘You like me.’ She didn’t frame it as a surprised question or a delighted statement. It sounded like she was mocking him for using such a trite word.
Julius brushed his thumbs over her creamy cheeks. ‘I like how you make me feel.’
‘How do I make you feel?’ Her voice was toneless. As if she didn’t really care how he answered.
‘You make me feel alive.’
‘Just...alive?’ Was that a hint of delight he was hearing in her voice? Was that a sparkle of hope shining in her toffee-brown eyes?
Julius stepped off the cliff. He could no longer deny what he felt. ‘I think I’m falling in love with you. No, strike that—I am in love with you. There’s no thinking required. I know.’
Her eyes widened to the size of billiard balls. ‘You’re joking.’
‘I’m not joking.’
‘You’re mad.’
‘Mad? No. Madly in love? Yes.’
She opened and closed her mouth. Swallowed. ‘But...but why?’
‘Why?’ Julius asked on the tail end of a laugh. ‘Because you’re the most fascinating, adorable, complicated and yet sweetest person I’ve ever met.’
Her forehead was lined again with worry. ‘But your mother hates me.’
He smoothed away her frown. ‘Only because she doesn’t know you yet. She’ll fall for you like I did once she gets to know how wonderful you are.’