Holly bit down on her lip as he strode into the en suite. He was upset with her for refusing but what else could she do? Dinner would have been nice but how could she control her emotions if he pressed her to do couple stuff? A romantic dinner for two was just plain wrong. She was not his romantic partner.
She never would be.
* * *
Julius knew he had no right to feel annoyed Holly had refused to go out in public with him. He knew they weren’t in a relationship. It was just a fling. A convenient interlude that was going to end once her community service was up. He should, in principle, be in agreement about keeping their affair out of the public eye but he had wanted to spend time with her away from the villa where she felt like a member of his staff rather than his equal. He wanted them to be just two ordinary people who had an attraction for each other. He wanted to spoil her in a way she had never been spoilt before.
The very fact she didn’t want to go public about their involvement was a confirmation of the sort of person she was underneath all that ‘junkyard dog’ bluster. She was sensitive and easily hurt. She hid that vulnerability behind her don’t-mess-with-me fa?ade. The horror of her past sickened him. He wanted to make it up to her. To make her feel safe in a way she had never felt before. He needed time to do that. But how much time did he have? Not much. Not enough.
For some reason every time he thought of her leaving he got a pain below his ribs. A tight, cramping pain as if someone was jabbing him. What would happen to her when she went to England? She had no one. No family to watch out for her. She would be totally alone. His family annoyed the hell out of him most of the time but at least he knew they were there when he needed them. Who would Holly turn to if things went sour?
The way she had trusted him to take her out on the balcony had moved him deeply. He had seen the years of terror in her face. Felt it in her hands as they gripped his so tightly. And yet she had stood out there in his arms and given him a shaky smile, trusting him to keep her safe. Who would keep her safe once she left him?
Why the heck was he ruminating so much about her leaving? Of course she had to leave. It was what she wanted. A new start in her mother’s homeland. A chance to get her life back on track, to pursue her dreams and put her past behind her. A past Julius would be part of. Would she ever think of him? Miss him?
He gave himself a mental shake and tried to refocus on the programme code in front of him. He wasn’t supposed to be developing feelings for her. It was fine to care about someone, sure. It was fine to want to see her get on her feet and reach her potential. But caring so much he couldn’t bear to think of letting her go was ridiculous. He hadn’t wanted her to come here in the first place. How could he possibly want her to stay indefinitely?
He didn’t do indefinitely.
Julius’s mobile rang, and he was about to ignore it but changed his mind when he saw it was his sister, Miranda. Finally. ‘Nice of you to get back to me.’
‘I’m sorry but I didn’t feel like talking to anyone,’ Miranda said.
It was what his baby sister did when things got difficult. She went to ground. He knew she would call him eventually but it worried him she had left it so long. ‘You okay?’
‘God, it’s just so embarrassing,’ she said. ‘Mum is beside herself and for once I can’t blame her.’
‘Have you met the girl yet?’
‘No,’ Miranda said. ‘Dad’s pushing for it. He wants a big family reunion . Can you believe it? Talk about lack of sensitivity. I just want to run away and hide some place until it all blows over.’
‘Have the press hassled you for a comment?’
‘Like, every day,’ she said. ‘The worse thing is they keep making comparisons. I’m now officially known as the ugly sister.’
‘That’s rubbish and you know it,’ Julius said.
‘Have you seen her, Julius?’ Miranda asked. ‘She’s stunning. Like one of those lingerie supermodels. And guess what? She’s an aspiring actor. Dad is so proud he finally produced a child with theatrical ambition. He keeps going on and on about it. It’s nauseating.’
‘What’s she been in? I haven’t heard of her before now.’
‘She’s only been in amateur things but now all she’ll have to do is name drop and the red carpet will be rolled out for her. You wait and see.’
‘Connections will only get her so far,’ Julius said. ‘She’ll need talent.’
Miranda gave a gusty sigh. ‘I don’t want to talk about it any more. So, how are you?’