“Do you want me?” he asks, his voice soft.
“Yes.” I squirm, making sure he can feel how wet I am.
“Fuck it.” A primal roar echoes loudly as Finn plunges into me. He stills and looks me in the eye. “Tell me you’re on something because now that I can feel your pussy caressing my bare dick I don’t want to cover it.”
“I am. I promise.” My hand reaches up to cup his cheek. He kisses my palm and starts moving his hips in a slow rhythm, never taking his smoldering eyes away from mine. I meet him thrust for thrust with my hands pressed to his backside, taking him in greedily and holding him there as long as possible until neither of us can hold on anymore.
14
Finn
The days of Macey being here and at my beck and call are numbered and I’m letting my heart get the best of me. Instead of doing the logical thing of going to work, I’m taking Macey away from Vegas for the day, showing her the Grand Canyon. I’m rationalizing this by saying to myself that she’s never seen the majestic beauty of the Colorado Plateau, she’s never experienced the Hoover Dam, traveled on Route 66 or tasted the freshness of handmade tortillas off the side of the road. And while all of this makes sense in my head, I’m regretting my decision. I’m straddling the proverbial tightrope and if I’m not careful I’m going to end up losing at my own game.
Truth is, after last night, after being with her without a barrier, something changed and as much as I don’t want to admit it, I don’t want her to leave. Except, she will and I’ll make sure of it, despite this feeling inside of me. Relationships are complicated and I can’t offer her whatever she may be looking for. Hell, I can’t offer it to myself because the thought of being with someone long term seems so foreign to me that it’s not an avenue I want to traverse. Not to mention, there’s someone named Morgan standing in the way. I asked her to take a shower with me, she agreed, and when she didn’t come in I went to look for her, spotting her in the kitchen talking on her phone. I stayed there, eavesdropping, until I heard the words that caused me to take a step back. I didn’t expect my heart to feel anything when she told Morgan that she loved him, but it did. And I hate myself for it. I’ve let myself become emotionally invested in her and that has to stop.
It’s rare that I take days off from work, but today I’m making an exception. Taking this drive is something I want to do. Not for me, but for her, because regardless of my inability to commit, Macey has done everything I’ve asked of her even when I didn’t deserve it. The top is off on the Jeep Wrangler and Macey is dressed casually in shorts and a tank top. Her hair is piled on the top of her head with wisps flying everywhere from the forced wind, and dark sunglasses shade her blue eyes. Eyes that told me so much last night that I didn’t even have to ask her how she felt. Each time I look over at her, her head is on a swivel taking in the sights of the desert, pointing in amazement and yelling questions at me. I know that today is something she’ll remember when she returns home. Maybe she’ll even bring Morgan back and remember that it was me who brought her here first. Sex is easily forgettable, especially when you’re being paid. When she goes home, I’m sure I’ll be the furthest thing from her mind. Besides, Morgan will be waiting for her. He’s probably a pimp or someone like that. I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that the more I think about him, the more pissed I get.
The more I’ve thought about her leaving, the more curious I have been. Many times I’ve been tempted to ask Lamar to figure out where exactly home is, but the less I know the better. Cutting ties with Macey is the only option that is feasible for me.
Pulling off the highway, we head toward the Hoover Dam. Years ago, Arizona constructed a new bridge, moving traffic away from the dam and, with increased security, making the dam a bona fide tourist site. After the car is searched and a small drive, we reach the parking area. Thankfully, it’s still early enough in the day that it’s not crowded with tourists.
“Ready?” I ask her, popping the latch on not only my seatbelt but hers as well. I don’t wait for her to answer before I’m moving around to the other side of the Jeep to open her door. When she’s out, she reaches for my hand, but as coyly as possible I slip it into my pocket. I need to get my head back into the game and shut my heart off. I don’t want her thinking that my thoughts have changed because they haven’t. The last thing I want to give her is hope that we have a future. She needs to know, without a doubt, that in two days we will never see each other again. I don’t care if she ends up in my casino again after this week. I’m done.