‘Not well.’ I take a deep breath. I debated whether I should tell Kev about Grace now, when he’s tired and with this unknown thing about Amy heavy between us, but now that we’re finally alone I can’t not say it. ‘The cancer’s spread. The doctor saw it when she did the surgery.’
Kev looks up, a flicker of something in his eyes. ‘How bad is it?’
‘They gave her three months to live, Kev.’ I stare at him, my heart beating so hard it hurts. He stares back at me, his expression unchanging and impassive.
‘Three months.’ He rakes a hand through his hair. ‘That’s tough.’
‘Yes…’
He shakes his head slowly. ‘Don’t go there, Heather.’
‘Go where?’
‘You know, Isaac.’ He sighs, a long, low release of breath. ‘Has Grace said anything?’
‘No.’ I think of the way she covered her face, her refusal to talk about it any more. ‘Not exactly.’
Kev just shakes his head again. I haven’t even said anything yet, and already I feel like I’ve demanded too much. Already he’s disappointed me. ‘Kev,’ I whisper, ‘he’s our son.’
‘Do you really think, after seven years, we can just take him back?’
‘The situation has changed.’
‘For Grace, yeah, I get that. But don’t you think she has someone in mind already to be his guardian or whatever? Someone suitable? She has friends, Heather.’
The assumption being that we’re not suitable? I swallow the words. ‘I don’t think she has someone in mind yet.’ Although of course I don’t actually know. ‘She asked me to help this time, and before, too, when Isaac needed to be picked up from school… she doesn’t have any relatives – her parents are dead, no brothers or sisters.’
‘So you’re the obvious choice.’ He sounds sarcastic, but I don’t care.
‘We are, Kev.’ I hear the throb of urgency in my voice. I haven’t let myself think this far, hope this much, until now. Until Kev put it into words, and I start tumbling headlong into a fantasy that could finally become real.
But he just shakes his head. Again. ‘How would it work?’ he asks me tiredly. He sounds defeated. ‘How the hell would it work?’
‘What do you mean?’
‘Isaac comes and lives with us here? Goes to school with our kids?’
‘He’s in elementary. He’d go to the same one Lucy—’
Kev snorts. ‘He’d fit right in there, wouldn’t he, huh? Grace would love having him there. Half the kids are on free lunches, and even more than that speak Spanish at home.’
‘Kev…’
‘What? You turning into the PC police? It’s true, Grace would hate having Isaac at a place like that.’ Before I can draw a breath he continues, relentless now. ‘And where would he sleep? Share with Lucy?’
I try not to flinch or fidget. He’s throwing up roadblocks left and right and I don’t have the energy to dodge them. ‘We’d work it all out.’
‘Yeah, how’s that going to happen, exactly? Because Isaac doesn’t belong here, Heather. He’d hate it, and so would Grace. She can barely stand to be here for three hours on a Saturday. You think she wants her son – yeah, her son – living here?’
I blink, absorbing all his words. The terrible truth of them. But I’m not going to just roll over. I can’t. ‘She has money,’ I say. ‘I’m sure she’s got life insurance or whatever…’
Kev’s lip curls. ‘So what are you saying?’
‘Isaac could go to private school, and her money could pay for it.’
‘And what else would her money pay for?’ Kev demands. ‘Isaac gets new clothes while our kids, the rest of our kids, go in rags?’
‘You’re exaggerating. It wouldn’t be like that—’