She reached for his hand, twining her fingers with his as she gave his fingers a squeeze. To her relief and joy, he squeezed back as they made their way into the villa.
* * *
This was a living hell as well as a surprising, unexpected heaven. Alex had anticipated some paparazzi to skulk around the villa, even though he knew Milly hadn’t. No society event in Rome would occur without some jaded journo or other covering it. He’d known people would be shocked; he’d kept his secret well, along with his loyal staff.
He’d also known it was time to reveal it. Over the last few days he’d come to realise Milly had been right when she’d said he couldn’t stay hidden away for ever, and the most surprising thing was, as painful as this felt, he didn’t even want to hide any more.
He was married, and hoped to have a child. He couldn’t live the way he had been, hiding not just from staring crowds but from life itself. This was the first important and challenging step, and he had Milly to thank for it.
No one spoke to them as they entered the villa, although Alex recognised many of the other guests. No one knew what to say. He’d kept a low profile, and so of course there had been rumours. Nervous breakdown, rehab, a top-secret deal, a consuming love affair. He’d always been a private man, and so the rumours had faded after a while as people assumed he was just keeping to himself. Now they would know the truth.
And the truth will set you free.
That, he acknowledged grimly, would be asking for too much. Still, he was here, and Milly was by his side, looking magnificent and fiercely proud, as if she would take on anyone who dared to say something amiss. At the sight of her something unfurled in Alex, something far more tender and important than the overwhelming physical chemistry they shared. Something he craved, even as he reminded himself to keep his distance. Keep both of them safe.
Yet he could hardly keep his distance now, as they debuted in society as a married couple. Now was the time for solidarity, for togetherness, or at least its illusion.
‘Alex...’ A hand clapped on his shoulder, and he turned to see an old business acquaintance, Lukas Petrakis, smiling at him with a mixture of warmth and sympathy. ‘I heard rumours of an accident, but they were so vague...’ he said in a low voice, his gaze flicking to the left side of his face.
‘Fire.’ Alex kept it succinct, and Lukas nodded with a grimace.
‘I’m so sorry...’
‘No matter.’
‘And this...?’ He turned to Milly.
‘This is Milly.’ Alex paused. ‘My wife.’
Lukas’ eyebrows rose briefly but otherwise his expression remained friendly and pleasant. ‘I’m so pleased to meet you. I didn’t realise Alex had married.’
‘Only recently,’ Milly answered with a smile. ‘We’re newly-weds.’
‘You’ve kept a lot quiet,’ Lukas remarked, ‘but then you always played your cards close to your chest.’
‘Indeed.’ Alex inclined his head, and they continued to move through the crowd.
It wasn’t, he came to realise as the evening progressed, as agonising as he’d expected. In fact, it was more than tolerable. Yes, some people looked at him with pity, others with horrified fascination, but for the most part people were kind, sympathetic, friendly.
With Milly by his side he felt stronger, able to face anything, even as he acknowledged that some part of him had always known it wouldn’t be so bad. It had been his pride along with his shame that had kept him hidden, unwilling to face people’s pity as well as the reality
of his own guilt every time another stranger caught sight of his scars.
It seemed his pride had now been dealt with, but as for his shame...
‘Anna’s playing now!’ Milly whispered excitedly, and Alex retrained his focus on the small stage set up at one end of the private ballroom. As a hush fell over the crowd, Anna entered, looking young and lovely in a black velvet evening gown. She searched the crowd for a moment, her face lighting up as she caught sight of Alex and Milly. And then she began to play.
The hauntingly sad and beautiful notes of Chaconne by Tomaso Vitali soared through the space and wrapped around Alex’s heart, each stroke of the bow on the violin seeming to reach right inside him. His fingers tightened on Milly’s as he let the music breathe through him, awakening longings and hopes he could no longer keep buried, at least not in this moment.
He wanted more for his life than the cold, lonely existence he’d been trudging through day by day for the last two years, and even for his whole life. Always keeping himself apart, first from safety from his father’s fists, and then from his own shame and guilt.
And he still felt the shame and guilt over failing Daphne, but he felt something else too. Hope. Fragile, faint, but there. Definitely there. He glanced at Milly, and saw tears sparkling in her eyes, and with a thrill of longing he wondered if she was as affected as he was. Felt the way he did...
It was all so much...the music, the evening, Milly. His life had broken open along with his heart, and he couldn’t control either any more. He didn’t even want to. He clung to Milly’s hand, or perhaps she clung to his. Either way they remained together, joined by their hands, the music, everything. Tonight he would tell her how he felt...
Then the piece ended, and the room was completely silent for a few taut seconds before the applause broke out, and Anna beamed.
Milly slid her hand from his as she began to clap. ‘I’m so proud of her,’ she murmured. ‘So proud. I never thought to have a moment like this...sorry, I’m turning into an emotional wreck, aren’t I?’ She smiled wryly as she dashed the tears from her cheeks, and Alex came back to reality with an almighty crash.