‘I think it should all be quite clear,’ Alex interjected. He’d been sitting on the sofa in the lawyer’s spacious office, silent and practically glowering, which Milly suspected was his usual look, at least when he had to appear in front of someone. The lawyer had seemed unsurprised by Alex’s scars, but still kept sneaking looks at them, which Alex clearly noticed.
Milly took a deep breath as she tried to marshal her thoughts. She’d listened to the lawyer for the last hour as he’d outlined the terms of the prenuptial contract, but she’d hardly taken any of it in. She could still barely believe she was here, that she was thinking of doing this. She was doing this.
Last night, after their brief chat, she and Alex had eaten dinner mostly in silence. The food had been delicious, but it had begun to taste like ashes in Milly’s mouth because she wanted conversation, not comfort. She wanted companionship, at least in a small degree, and as the evening had worn on she’d feared Alex would not be able to give it to her. Didn’t want to give it to her, which was worse.
She’d made a few attempts, asking him why he chose to settle on Naxos—because it was convenient—and what his business was actually about—buying and selling property. She’d given up after a while, which she suspected was what Alex had wanted. Milly hadn’t expected hearts and rainbows from him; of course she hadn’t. But a little conversation wouldn’t have gone amiss. She told herself it was better to know what to expect, and at least he wasn’t attempting to flatter her the way Philippe had. Still, it felt like cold comfort indeed.
After dinner he’d returned to his apartment, curtly informing her that a limo would pick her up at nine for her medical exam, and then take her afterwards to his lawyer’s office where they would go over the prenuptial agreement.
Then Milly had spent a restless night wondering what on earth was she doing even as she knew she wasn’t going to change her mind. She couldn’t, for Anna’s sake. For Anna’s happiness.
But this morning she was awfully tempted. First, she’d endured the most clinical medical exam she’d ever had at a private medical clinic, squirming in indignity and shame as the doctor had asked her questions about her period, her sexual history, her fertility.
When she’d left the office, her cheeks still scarlet with mortification, Alex had been waiting in the back of his limo. She’d blushed harder when he’d informed her that the doctor would email him the report. So now he would know her periods were regular, she’d never had an STD, and even that she was a virgin. Milly couldn’t bear to meet his eye, but he didn’t seem eager to meet hers, either.
He’d ushered her quickly into the limousine, and since then he’d seemed intent on ignoring her as much as possible. He looked devastatingly attractive in his steel-grey suit, his eyes piercing and blue, his dark hair the perfect foil to his crisp white shirt. The lawyer was obsequious in the way he studiously avoided looking at Alex’s scars, and she could tell it annoyed Alex. It annoyed her as well.
She was already getting used to them, seeing the scars simply as part of who he was. Perhaps because she’d been around such superficial beauty for so long, she found she didn’t mind them in a way he seemed to think people did. Her mother had chased physical perfection with spa days and surgery, expensive ointments and endless make-up, and in the end the beauty was nothing more than a glossy veneer. At least Alex’s scars were real.
‘Are you going to sign it, Milly?’ Alex asked, his voice cutting through her jumbled thoughts. ‘Or not?’
‘Sorry...’ She’d been simply staring into space for the last minutes, and she saw now that the lawyer was impatient, Alex annoyed. She reached for the heavy, expensive-looking fountain pen the lawyer had laid on the table next to the contract and uncapped it, her heart starting to thud.
She hadn’t been able to take in all the terms the man had gone through, but she knew enough to understand the gist of what she was signing. Sort of.
She’d receive the five million euros as soon as they were wed. They were to have regular conjugal relations until she was confirmed pregnant. She would live on Naxos, but be free to travel to Alex’s homes in London and Athens. Any other trips needed to be approved by him, although he’d assured her he would be reasonable. It felt a little bit like prison, a gilded cage, and yet, considering what she was getting, nothing seemed that unreasonable.
And yet...in the end, she was still selling herself for money. Did a wedding ring really make it respectable?
‘Milly...’ Alex said her name like a warning, and she closed her eyes.
She couldn’t back out now. For Anna. She was doing this for Anna. Her mother had married various minor aristocrats so she could fund her extravagant lifestyle. Milly was doing it for the person—the only person—she loved. It was completely different. It had to be.
Wordlessly she bent her head, the contract’s type swimming in front of her, and signed her name. Milly felt as if she’d just opened a vein and dripped blood onto the snowy white documents.
‘There we are,’ the lawyer said smoothly and picked up the contract, shuffling the papers into a neat pile. ‘I believe that concludes our business for today.’
‘T
hank you.’ Alex turned towards the door, and Milly followed him, her stomach churning.
What had she done?
For Anna. This is for Anna.
‘That wasn’t so bad, was it?’ Alex asked her once they were safely ensconced in his limousine, the tinted windows hiding them from the world.
‘I suppose not.’ Milly’s voice was shaky and she found she had to blink back tears. She hated feeling so raw and uncertain; she’d revelled in the quiet solitude of the last six months, the safety of them, and now she felt as if she’d just upended her entire life. She had no idea what to expect. Nothing felt certain or safe. Were they really going to be married tomorrow?
‘Don’t look so devastated, then,’ Alex said, his voice a sardonic drawl. ‘I promise I will make as few demands on your time as possible.’ He turned away from her to look out of the window, and Milly tried to speak past the lump forming in her throat.
‘Is that what you think I want?’ He merely shrugged, and she made herself continue. ‘I’m not expecting some sort of fairy tale, Alex. Of course I’m not. I wouldn’t even want one, because I know they’re not real.’
‘Then we don’t have a problem.’
‘It would just be nice to be friends,’ Milly persisted, her voice turning a little ragged. ‘Right now it feels as if you can barely tolerate me.’
‘I can tolerate you?’ He let out a harsh laugh. ‘Let’s be honest with each other, Milly, if we can’t be anything else.’