“No, Ghost, honey, yours are here. ” She says as she points to another platter of cupcakes.
Ghost narrows his eyes at her and questions, “Why are these mine? You spit in em or some shit?”
Tina looks shocked that he would think that but responds, “Um, no. You said you preferred crunchy peanut butter so I made you your own batch. ”
Ghost looks stunned. His brows are raised and his mouth hangs open a little. He straightens his face and asks quietly, “You made these special?”
Tina looks uncomfortable and slightly flushed. She straightens things on the table that don’t need straightening. “Uh…” She shrugs and looks to the floor. “You gotta eat, right?”
She walks back into the kitchen leaving a shocked Ghost staring at his personal batch of cupcakes.
Max walks up behind him and scolds, “You’re such an ass. I bet you don’t even like crunchy PB. ”
Ghost answers in a small voice still frowning, “No. I do. A lot. ”
Max gets a load of Ghost’s confused expression and smirks.
Ghost picks up a cupcake and confirms, “So, she’s genuinely nice, huh?”
Max smirks harder, “Yep. ” He pops the p.
Ghost shakes his head and mutters, “Fuck me. ”
***
I’ve hidden out in the kitchen long enough. I straighten my back and move to walk out of the kitchen when Ceecee rolls her way in. My god, but this child is beautiful. She looks up at me and smiles big with her crooked teeth.
“Hi Tina!”
Smiling, I reply, “Hi Ceecee. How are you, angel?”
She looks up in thought, “I’m okay. ”
Okay? Just okay?
I don’t like that. Children should be happy. They should at least be good.
I walk toward her, stroke her cheek and ask, “Everything okay?”
She sighs, “Yeah, I guess. ”
I can see she doesn’t really want to talk about it. There is hesitance written all over her sweet face.
“Well, if you ever want to talk to me about anything,” I say as I walk back to my purse, pull out paper and a pen and start writing, “here is my phone number. ”
She looks at the paper in wonder, eyes wide and whispers, “I can call you anytime?”
Without hesitating I answer, “Anytime at all. If you ever feel like you want to talk or need some advice, I’ll be available on that number, sweetie. ”
Her face transitions from shock to happiness and she beams at me, “Thanks Tina. ” She folds the paper and puts it in her pocket.
We both move out of the kitchen to find the pizza has arrived. I make a plate for Ceecee, bring
it over to her and kiss her forehead.
Mia would be five if she were alive.
I can’t stop the pain from clutching my heart. I think about her every day and I wonder what my life would be like if she were still here. It’s a moot point. She’s not here. I miss her, though.