“You looked very pensive. You didn’t even notice my arrival.” He offered me his hand and I took it to stand, brushing away any loose grass that may be on my pants. “What were you thinking about?”
“All of the secretaries that met their demise before my arrival.”
“Their demise?” Aramis chuckled deeply. “How so?”
“Well, they all quit, or were driven out of here, I guess.”
“And you think you’ll quit?”
“Maybe. I guess it depends how all of this plays out.”
“This ride?” He perked an eyebrow, shooting me a sideways glance as we walked toward the horses. He was entirely too good-looking for his own good. For my own good.
“This pretend relationship.”
“Ah, that.” He glanced away to hide a smile.
“I hate that you’re so amused by all of it.”
“Am I? I wasn’t aware.”
“You’re clearly amused. You keep smiling and laughing every time I bring it up.”
“Because your reaction is funny. You seem to think anyone will care that we’re together.”
“We’re not together. I think everyone will care that we’re lying to them once they find out it’s all for show.”
“Don’t worry about that.” He shrugged a shoulder.
“Look at me, Pa!” Oscar shouted, grinning from ear to ear.
“You look great up there, Mon Grand.” Aramis grinned back.
“We’ll take the short route,” Monsieur Paul said. “Rose will ride Sally alongside us.”
Sally was a beautiful white horse that looked a lot like the one Monsieur Paul and Oscar were riding.
“I’ll take Mademoiselle Joslyn with me,” Aramis said. “We’ll catch up by the rose garden.”
Monsieur Paul tapped the horse lightly with his feet and rode off, Rose closely beside them, talking to Oscar.
“Why didn’t you ride with Oscar?” I followed Aramis into the stable, where his horse was waiting. I knew it was his because I’d seen him riding once when I visited with Pilar here. Shadow was the name of the horse, and he was a striking black stallion.
“I thought it would be best if Monsieur Paul began teaching him the basics.”
It was a fair point, of course, being that Paul knew more about horses than all of us combined, but still. I shook my head. “You know the basics. I know the basics.”
“Did you want to ride with my son?” Aramis raised an eyebrow as he took hold of Shadow’s reins and began putting them on him slowly, petting and kissing the animal as if it too were his son and dammit if that didn’t make my heart flip. I glanced away. I needed to get a hold of my emotions if I was going to survive this.
“No, I’m fine riding with you.”
He smirked, his green eyes aglow with a new sort of defiance, and I knew I was in trouble.
Chapter Fifteen
Aramis
I liked the way her arms felt when they were wrapped around me. I liked the way her legs squeezed my hips as we rode the stallion. Unfortunately, my cock liked it too much. I needed to get a grip. I was a man, not a schoolboy. It was the closest Joslyn and I had been in years though. Sure, she showed up at my parties to break them up and tell people to go home. Sure, she helped me pack my bags for trips and went over my schedules every day when I was making appearances on behalf of my brother and The Crown. She thought I was this playboy, just like everyone else did, but she didn’t realize that I hadn’t slept with anyone in over six months now. Gone were my playboy days, not because I wasn’t interested in women, but because the last time I tried to get naked in front of one I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t bare myself to anyone these days, not with the burns I had from the fire. I hadn’t even taken my shirt off in front of Joslyn, something I used to do constantly just to watch her blush.
Insecurity was something I’d never dealt with in life, not before this, and I hated it. I used to preach about how everyone should be accepting of their bodies, their flaws. I’d always been an admirer of all shapes and sizes and used to get upset at women who didn’t feel comfortable with their own nudity in front of me. And now I’d become one of them. Joslyn didn’t know that though. She had no idea what I was dealing with internally. She had no idea that even though I absolutely relished the way her arms squeezed me as we rode, I was also in pain. She knew I’d been burned in the accident, but had never seen me once they took off my wrappings. The surgeons did an incredible job with skin grafting, but incredible wasn’t perfect, and I was used to perfect. When we reached the woods that surrounded the lake, just beyond the rose garden, I asked Shadow to slow down and came to a stop.