Julian nodded. "I know that you were only the bearer of news, not the cause of our loss. But your visit here will not be remembered with happiness. Yet I want you to know that I understand how kindly you have done this miserable job."
She nodded. "And you have been unfailingly gracious in a difficult hour."
Julian opened the door of her car. She stooped to the seat, swung her legs inside. But before he could close the door for her, she thought of one last question, a very important one.
"Julian, I know you were planning to have a daughter next. But if you had gone on to bring another son into the world, what would you have named him?"
"Our firstborn was named for my father, Nikolai," he said. "But Elena wanted to name a second son for me."
"Julian Delphiki," said Sister Carlotta. "If this truly is your son, I think he would be proud someday to bear his father's name."
"What name does he use now?" asked Julian.
"Of course I cannot say."
"But . . . not Volescu, surely."
"No. As far as I'm concerned, he'll never hear that n
ame. God bless you, Julian Delphiki. I will pray for you and your wife."
"Pray for our children's souls, too, Sister."
"I already have, and do, and will."
Major Anderson looked at the boy sitting across the table from him. "Really, it's not that important a matter, Nikolai."
"I thought maybe I was in trouble."
"No, no. We just noticed that you seemed to be a particular friend of Bean. He doesn't have a lot of friends."
"It didn't help that Dimak painted a target on him in the shuttle. And now Ender's gone and done the same thing. I suppose Bean can take it, but smart as he is, he kind of pisses off a lot of the other kids."
"But not you?"
"Oh, he pisses me off, too."
"And yet you became his friend."
"Well, I didn't mean to. I just had the bunk across from him in launchy barracks."
"You traded for that bunk."
"Did I? Oh. Eh."
"And you did that before you knew how smart Bean was."
"Dimak told us in the shuttle that Bean had the highest scores of any of us."
"Was that why you wanted to be near him?"
Nikolai shrugged.
"It was an act of kindness," said Major Anderson. "Perhaps I'm just an old cynic, but when I see such an inexplicable act I become curious."
"He really does kind of look like my baby pictures. Isn't that dumb? I saw him and I thought, he looks just like cute little baby Nikolai. Which is what my mother always called me in my baby pictures. I never thought of them as me. I was big Nikolai. That was cute little baby Nikolai. I used to pretend that he was my little brother and we just happened to have the same name. Big Nikolai and Cute Little Baby Nikolai."
"I see that you're ashamed, but you shouldn't be. It's a natural thing for an only child to do."