She still felt numb inside. She sat back in the corner, the cloak pulled tight around her, pain and sorrow threading through her body. She sat silent, lost, until she saw that they were following the river, the wrong way to the château.
“Where are we going? You said you’d take me to Lydia,” she said sharply. If one more man betrayed her—
“My dear cousin,” he said smoothly, “I told you I had much to report. Your dear sister is fine, staying with her fiancé, Etienne de Giverney. You needn’t worry, there are proper chaperones, and they’re planning a small wedding as soon as they can manage it. She sends you her love, and tells you not to worry about her. ”
“She’s going to marry Etienne?” Elinor said, doubtful. It had seemed the best solution, but she remembered Lydia’s wailing confession that she loved Charles Reading. Something had brought her to her senses—love was a trick, a trap, an illusion. Etienne would take care of her—there was no need for this sudden apprehension.
“Apparently he’s been visiting her out at the château every day, pressing his suit, and she finally agreed. It’s just as well he took her from under Rohan’s roof, don’t you agree?”
Author: Anne Stuart
“Absolutely,” she said numbly. “Can I see her?”
“It would be wiser not to at the moment. You haven’t yet asked me about my proposition. ”
She forced herself to evince an interest. “Of course, cousin. I’m very interested. ” Perhaps he had an elderly aunt who needed a companion, or a cousin who needed a governess. Except that he had no family—his family was hers.
“I know this will sound unexpected, but I’ve thought it through in great detail, and it seems as if it would answer everything. It might not be what you want, but I suspect it would work out very well indeed, and…”
“Cousin,” Elinor interrupted him, some of her old fire coming back. “What are you trying to say?”
He took her hand and got down on one knee in the swaying coach, and she watched him in utter horror. “I’m asking you to marry me, Cousin Elinor. I believe we should get on very well together, and I can’t help but feel that all the grand things I’ve inherited really should be yours, but for an accident of birth. I want to share them with you. ”
“Cousin…” she said gently, trying to hide her annoyance.
“Indeed, I have the utmost respect for you, dear lady, and…and fondness. I think we can grow to love each other very deeply, and I beg you will consider my offer. ”
She stared down at him for a long moment, all the while he attempted to keep his balance as the coach rattled along the rough roads. It would answer everything, she thought numbly. Rohan would hear she’d married, and promptly forget all about her, which is what she wanted. If she couldn’t have him then she wanted it over, completely.
She looked at her handsome cousin, holding her hand in his. “Yes,” she said in practical tones. “But I would like to return to England immediately. ”
His smile was beatific. “Dear girl! I have a small ship waiting for us at Calais. We can be in England by tomorrow. ”
Tomorrow. She’d be far away from this place, the country where she’d lived for the last ten years, the place she’d grown up in, the place she’d lost the only mother she’d ever known. Not to mention Lady Caroline.
He could never follow her. It didn’t matter if he suddenly came to his senses, remembered the long hours in each others’ arms, the heat, the tenderness. He couldn’t come after her. To follow her would be to risk his life. His miserable, ill-begotten life. “And my sister?”
“We’ll have her and her new husband to visit us as soon as we’re settled,” he said. “We can get married by special license almost as soon as we reach Dorset. You don’t know how happy you’ve made me, my dear. I was afraid it was too much to hope for. ”
He rose up, taking the seat beside her, and she immediately jumped up and took the seat opposite him, oddly unwilling to have him so near.
“There is something I must tell you, Cousin Marcus,” she said, “which might cause you to change your mind. ”
“I can’t imagine what, my dear. ”
“I’ve lived a…a difficult life for the past few years. ”
He nodded vigorously. “I know you have. It angers me that your father couldn’t have aided you when you most needed him. ”
“I’m afraid…Marcus, I’m no longer a maid. ”
He didn’t even blink. “I’m sure it wasn’t your fault, my dear. I am certainly not one to hold blame. You will be modest and faithful to me, and that is all that matters. ”
For a moment she didn’t move. “Yes, Marcus,” she said finally. “Then I will marry you. ”
“Darling cousin,” he said, beaming at her.
It wouldn’t be too awful, she thought, leaning back in the corner of the coach. He knew enough not to try to sit beside her again, not to touch her or kiss her. He would be polite, patient. And in truth, she could lie beneath him and let him rut on her body, because she knew with utter certainty that that was all he would do. There would be no touches, hard and then gentle, no kisses. And she would be fine.