“For years?” He crosses his arms and studies me. “For what?” He looks genuinely confused, but that doesn’t surprise me.
I roll my eyes at him and take a sip of water. I don’t even know if it’s worth mentioning anymore. As I try walking past him, he blocks me and am forced to look at him.
“I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about, Viola.”
His features are hard and he’s not letting me pass by him.
“Don’t act stupid,” I state harshly. “You know exactly what I’m talking about. I was your pity friend, and I won’t allow myself to be that girl again…” His face tightens and he clenches his jaw. The man is a human wall, blocking me from running away.
“I don’t.”
“Whatever.” I don’t have the strength for this argument right now. “Please let me by,” I bite out. I need to leave before the tears come. I don’t know how much longer I can hold them in.
“Just wait a goddamn minute,” he demands. “When have I ever said I was your friend out of pity?” He’s dangerously close. I inhale his cologne, stirring up all my emotions.
“My thirteenth birthday. You made it the worst one I’ve ever had. Thanks, asshole.”
The emotions start to surface, so I try to walk past him again before he can respond, but he makes it impossible. “I never said—”
I cut him off before he has a chance to deny it. “You were talking to Drew. You said I’d never be anything more than your best friend’s annoying little sister. I was a loner with no friends. That I only had my books and stupid characters, along with a lot of other shitty things. You took pity on me and only befriended me because you felt sorry for me.”
“Viola…”
“You broke my heart, Travis. I was only a kid, but I trusted you. I held out hope every single day that I’d get to see you, even if just in passing. You didn’t make me feel like a burden to have around. You made me feel special.” I close my eyes, holding the tears back.
Realization sets in, his body tensing. “You were never a burden, Viola.” I hear the sincerity of his words, but I shake my head. I don’t want to hear it.
“It’s one thing to hear those things from your big brother, but hearing them come out of your mouth; I was destroyed.”
“You have to know, I didn’t mean what I said, Viola. I would never think those things.”
“You know, it’s funny, because even while I was listening, I kept holding out hope that maybe just maybe you were pulling some stupid birthday prank on me.”
His shoulders relax as he lowers and shakes his head in disbelief. “That’s why you cut me out of your life? You overheard Drew and me.”
“What was I supposed to do? I was practically in love with you and you’d just confessed your true feelings for me. I felt like an idiot.”
“Why didn’t you say anything?”
“Say anything?” I repeat. “I was humiliated! Here I was coming to find you so I could thank you for the gift when I hear you say it was all out of pity. After that it was as if you purposely flaunted every girl you were with, just to prove your point and dig the knife deeper.” My heart pumps louder in my chest, adrenaline rushing through my veins, as I relive the memories. “Everything I thought I’d felt between us was shattered. I was devastated.”
He rubs his fingers over the stubble that runs the length of his jaw. His lips are in a firm line, and as much as I’m trying to read him, nothing prepares me for what he says next.
“You were devastated?” His deep tone takes me off guard, his eyes narrowing in on me. “I was fucking wrecked, Viola. You ruined me.”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“I never pitied you, Viola. Ever. You’re the main reason I was over all the damn time. How didn’t you see that?”
“Well, the flock of girls around you didn’t really give me that impression.”
“You should’ve known me better than that to know I’d never mean those words. Drew and a few other guys kept cracking jokes about you and were giving me shit for hanging out with you all the time and I just wanted to shut them up. Drew teased you behind your back every chance he could and so I said the only thing I could think of to shut him up.”
“They sounded real to me,” I say, not quite sure how I feel about his confession.
“So after everything we’d been through, it was just that easy to drop me?” he asks, hurt evident in his tone. “Was that it?”
“Are you kidding right now? I cried myself to sleep for months! I missed you so goddamn much, all while hating your guts. My emotions were all over the place, and then when I started high school, you were all my friends talked about. It was torture.”