Chapter One
Hunter
The walls in the airport feel as if they’re closing in as Lennon and I enter. Though we’re only visiting Utah for a few days, we have enough luggage between the two of us to check bags as well as bringing a carry-on. Hoards of people crowd around, and the line to the service counter is long as hell, but that’s to be expected on a Sunday before a holiday. It’s why we had to leave immediately after Jenna unexpectedly showed up at our door. Seeing her was just as much of a surprise to me as it was to Lennon.
After Jenna announced her pregnancy, which was obvious once I saw her stomach, she expected me to fall to my knees, excited and happy, but I refused to give her the attention she’s wanted from the very beginning.
Once Jenna left, Lennon closed up so tight, I couldn’t get through to her. I’d basically just told her we were a family, that I’d be there for her and the baby no matter what, and then this clusterfuck happened. Last night, sleeping with Lennon in her bed was everything, and it felt so damn right. While I hate the circumstances that led us to this point, I’m happy I get to be the man to keep her safe and protect her.
We didn’t have time to talk about it, though I wanted to spill all my truths and explain how I knew Jenna’s baby isn’t mine. It’s not an easy conversation to have, so I can’t just spit it out and expect things to go back to normal. The thought reminds me of Brandon and the insecurities instilled by my father. Never felt good enough for him, and definitely knew I wasn’t good enough for a woman like Lennon, which is why I never got between her and Brandon. I knew he was the better man for Lennon, how he could give her everything she needed, how he could give her a family, and now thinking he’s not even here now to be apart of it. I wish I could give her that family she craves, but knowing I never could. I couldn’t give one to anyone, even if I wanted to.
On the drive to the airport, Lennon’s responses were short and to the point, so I got the hint and stopped talking. After the first time Jenna and I hooked up, I knew better than to continue seeing her, and it came back to bite me straight in the ass.
Stupid, stupid, stupid.
Once we make it through security, we walk toward our gate. Lennon stops and makes a quick bathroom break, and when she returns, I let out a huff.
“Are we going to talk about this?” I ask; her silence eats me alive.
When Lennon glances over, her blue eyes burn straight through me. “Talk about what?”
We’re standing in the middle of the airport as people pass us by. “About Jenna. About what happened at the apartment. You’re obviously upset.” Heat rushes through me when she clenches her jaw. I can almost see the wheels turning in her head as she contemplates what to say. She’s transparent, and I see every inch of her and hear the words she refuses to say. Part of me wants to pull her into my arms and tell her it’s not what she thinks, but now is not the time or place.
Eventually, she speaks. “I’m not upset. I have no right to be, Hunter. You’re a single guy. I’m just shocked, that’s all. You keep saying you’ll be there for me, and I feel like my fucked-up situation will hold you back from your own life and from being there for your baby. Hearing that news was a wake-up call for me.” Lennon shrugs, then continues, “I should be used to things drastically changing when I get too comfortable.” The sadness in her tone isn’t lost on me, and my heart lurches forward as I think of her and Brandon. They were living their happily ever after, and it was ripped away in a snap. I swallow hard, pushing down the thoughts of it, wishing things were different.
Turning my body to face her, I take her hand in mine and rest it against my chest. I’m sure she can feel my heart rapidly beating. “Trust me when I say that baby isn’t mine, Lennon. It’s not.”
“It doesn’t matter if it is. You aren’t mine, Hunter, and I’m not yours to worry about.” Her words pierce straight through my heart like a dagger. If she only knew how much I’ve wished that was my reality, she wouldn’t have said that. It has me questioning everything, though. Does she want me to be hers? All she’d have to do is say the word.
I’m yours, and you don’t even realize it, I want to say, but I keep it to myself.