“I think, Jason, all being well, when I go on maternity leave from my job, I won’t be going back. Will I?” She ventured the thought.
“No. I think you have an idea where your future is going, don’t you? A much clearer picture.”
“Yes. Definitely. Not a sketch any longer.”
She watched Jason eat. Seeing him content and relaxed boosted her happiness. “You’re the best husband ever,” she blurted.
Jason put down his fork and reached across to take her hand. “I’m a good husband because you are a good wife.” He kissed the back of her hand, smiled, and returned to his food.
They didn’t go to the dungeon lair that evening. The playroom with its whipping bench, ropes, and pulleys, drawers filled with kinky-sex toys, and the four-poster bed complete with restraints. All of their secrets hidden in a windowless room with a locked door Jason had the only key to open. His decision hit Gemma hard: the shunning of his indulgent lair exemplified the fact he was treating her differently.
Jason took her to the sitting room and drew her onto his lap. “I want you to visit that GP of yours as soon as possible.”
She looked at him with his eyes blue and bright in the late evening sunshine. “It isn’t necessary. It’s too early. I know from Trudy, they don’t bother with tests or scans for a few weeks. In case….” She wasn’t going to say the word miscarriage.
“That’s not what I want you to see her about.”
They might not be in the lair, but his voice held the tone of that room. “I want you to get a referral to a private obstetrician. As soon as possible. A good private maternity clinic. No expense spared, and a woman, not a man. Someone you can talk freely to about us. Do you understand?”
She blinked for a few seconds—about us—those two words said much. Not Mr and Mrs Lucas, he meant them as Dominant and submissive. Them, as in the lair and their BDSM lifestyle.
“What do I need to find out about?” The palms of her hands itched with sweat. What did Jason intend for her as his submissive?
“All those doubts, questions, and issues floating about in your pretty head. This is for you, not me. I know quite a bit already. I have my own medical contacts. I don’t want to tell you what is and is not possible. You have to find out for yourself. Address everything about being pregnant and a submissive in a BDSM relationship—what you can and cannot do, to protect yourself and our baby. The sooner, the better. I see already the worries on your face. Do you go into the lair? What sex acts are safe? I could tell you, but you need to be reassured by somebody independent of me and not from the Internet.”
His request surprised her. “Talk openly about us?”
“Yes, you have my permission, of course. A respectable doctor is obliged to keep your consultations confidential, assuming you don’t portray me as an abusive husband.” He smirked and then looked away. Neither of them liked to talk about abuse.
“No, of course not. I wouldn’t—”
He put his finger on her lips.
“I know that. You need to ensure whoever looks after you while you’re pregnant understands that, too. Gem, I know you. You’re already fretting about how we go forward. The sooner your questions are answered, the better. I don’t think in these early weeks you would have any problems. The baby is miniscule and not going to be harmed. But if you’re stressed and anxious, that is not good for the pair of you. I have no intention of creating fear in you or terror. That isn’t what we do when we play. You are and always will be safe with me.”
Did he think she didn’t trust him? She couldn’t imagine not trusting him, as it would bring their world of D/s crashing down about them.
“I do trust you. I will seek advice, and then we can talk about it together. Can’t we?” She took his hand in her own and squeezed it.
He gave a small squeeze back. “Sure. Nothing is going to happen without your consent. Now, do you want me to take you into the lair or stay out of it until you’ve had your consultation?”
Crunch time. He’d said he knew what he could and couldn’t do with her. He would have researched the consequences of pregnancy and BDSM as soon as she came off the pill. Did she need to hear it all for herself?
Yes, she decided, for her baby’s sake. The tiny thing inside of her had only her to nurture and care for it because that was the purpose of her body. She was no longer there just for Jason, her Dominant and husband, her lover. She must safeguard their baby, too.
“Believe me, I trust you, Jason. However, you’re right about my doubts. I need to think this through. I don’t want the pain or restraints yet. I can’t consent, not without understanding what I’m capable of doing. Make love to me. I can do that, at least. I’m sure I can.”
She gave him her best confident smile. He smiled back and her heart thumped with relief.
“Let’s go make love then, Gem. Vanilla, for now.” He kept hold of her, leading her upstairs, and a thought passed into her mind. A clear, concise realisation. She
let go as they entered the bedroom, hovering in the open space by the bay window.
“Jason, I only said the pain and restraints. You know, no bondage, intense-impact play, or sadism. You can still be my Dominant. Take me to bed as my Master. Please.” She pleaded with her eyes as much as her words.
To make her point, she knelt at Jason’s feet. His face drew into an expression of ecstasy. The bulge in his pants grew. She’d hit the jackpot. She had given him consent to keep the one aspect of their lifestyle that was most important to them both. His domination and her submission. Both were feasible without their dungeon and kinky sex; their needs could be satisfied in other ways.
“Come, then. Come and please your Master.”