I’d like to know that as well.
“I guess it doesn’t matter anymore. You guys rescued me. But if they came to the village for me then why kill everyone else?”
“Because they’re extremists. All they care about is their cause, not how much damage they do to those around them.”
She shook her head. “It’s my fault.”
He should have known that was coming. He tilted her face up, hating the tears that ran down her face, the sheer misery and guilt he could see. “It’s not your fault. It’s their fault.”
“But they came to get me, right? If I hadn’t been there . . . if I’d just listened to my parents. They were right to not want me to go.”
Except their reasons, like his, were purely selfish. They didn’t want her to go because they wanted to keep her safe. Jenna, as usual, was thinking of everyone else but herself.
“What about during the time you were held captive? Do you remember much from then?”
She wiped her face with her sleeve, the action reminding him of when he’d first met her. Only three years old with tears running down her round face, her lower lip trembling as she stared down at the melting blob of ice cream on the ground.
“A bit, I guess. Are you sure you want to hear all this?”
No, he didn’t. But if there was something he’d learned it was that not talking didn’t help. Not that he ever talked about his bad shit. But he didn’t want Jenna making his mistakes. It was too late for him. He’d keep his issues buried until he died. She had her whole life ahead of her. She could go find that doctor to marry. Someone who’d look after her like she deserved. She’d have a big house, three kids, a crazy dog, and a husband who came home each night for dinner.
“Yes, tell me.” Damn he hated this. If he thought he had any hope in hell of finding the assholes who’d taken her, he’d be searching them out now and making them pay for each bruise they’d inflicted on her, every moment of fear. But they’d scattered, and he’d be chasing his own tail.
“I knelt there in the dirt, staring down at Alana’s body. She didn’t move. Her eyes just stared, and I knew she was dead. But I couldn’t help but reach over and touch her. I thought I was next. I thought the next gunshot was going to kill me. Someone grabbed me roughly from behind. Before I could do anything, before I could react, there was a prick on my neck. When I woke up I was in that dark hut, the one you found me in. I felt so ill. Whatever they gave me didn’t agree with me, and I started vomiting. I had no idea where I was. It was so dark, I couldn’t see anything in front of me, not even my own hand. I’ve never been somewhere so dark.”
He kissed the top of her head soothingly.
“I still have to sleep with the light on,” she confessed quietly.
“So do I.”
She snorted and pulled back to smile up at him. “You are so full of shit. You’re not afraid of anything.”
“You think not?” She was right, not much scared him. Except for her. His feelings for her. He knew he had to put some distance between them. He didn’t want to f
eel this way about anyone.
“When I finally stopped vomiting, I tried to move. I thought perhaps they’d dumped me somewhere. When I attempted to stand, I realized there was something around my ankle. I couldn’t walk more than a few feet. I started to cry then. I bawled like a baby.”
She sounded almost ashamed of her reaction.
“Most people would have done the same.”
“Not you.”
“True, but I think we established I’m superman.”
“I thought you said you couldn’t be superman because you didn’t have a weakness.”
“Jesus, that makes me sound like an arrogant ass.”
“If the shoe fits . . .” She grinned at him. A real grin. He tickled her lightly, and she giggled, trying to get away from him.
“Little brat. Should have spanked you as a kid, maybe then you wouldn’t be giving me this lip.”
She snorted. “You wouldn’t have spanked me.”
Not then, but now? He pushed that thought from his head.