After taking a deep breath, I do. “The night before I left for The Testing, my father told me that his memories from that time in his life had been erased. Sometime during The Testing, I must have become determined to keep my memories. So I left myself a message. I found it on my birthday.” I’d been so happy. Tomas had told me he thought he was falling in love with me. I’d gotten a gift from my family. When I found my Testing symbol etched onto the Transit Communicator, I was giddy with delight at uncovering a secret. Then I pushed Play.
“I tried to convince myself it was another kind of test. I didn’t want to believe that The Testing killed candidates who failed or that people I considered my friends could be capable of murder.” My throat tightens, making it hard to speak. But now that I’ve started talking, I have to tell it all. In a way, it is a relief to speak my doubts and my worries after months of shouldering the burden alone. “But the message I left is real. Isn’t it? Will murdered a girl named Nina. He tried to kill me. And Tomas . . .” Words fail. Now that I believe the truth of the recorder, I must accept that Tomas deceived me. That he was involved in Zandri’s death, although I have no idea what part he played. But Michal might. “What did Tomas do to Zandri?” I ask.
“I don’t know.” Sympathy shines in his eyes. “Only top-level officials are permitted to read the detailed examination files.”
Disappointment fills me, although I’m not surprised. “So now what?”
“Now you’re going to pretend that none of this happened.”
“I don’t understand.”
Michal looks off in the distance. “Six years ago, I passed The Testing. Only, when they performed the memory-elimination procedure, something went wrong. Two months after I started classes here at the University, my memories returned. I remembered watching my best friend die during The Testing and that the University student I had a crush on was the one who’d slit his throat. I learned that I too had killed. It was self-defense, but knowing I’d taken a life, even to save mine . . .”
I touch my scars—the five lines made by five fingernails—and hear my voice whisper. I didn’t have a choice. I had to shoot. But when I fired my gun, I saw its eyes and realized it wasn’t an animal I’d killed.
“I started having nightmares. I watched my friend die over and over at night and had to pretend during the day that none of it had happened. One night, I decided I couldn’t take it anymore. I grabbed my things and ran. As soon as I stepped off campus, I realized I had nowhere to go. My family would be in danger if I could get back to Boulder Colony, and since I didn’t have enough food or water for the journey, it was doubtful I’d get back there at all. That’s when I saw him.”
“Who?”
“A man I remembered meeting during The Testing. You met him too.”
A shadow of a memory flickers, but just as quickly vanishes like smoke.
“His name is Symon Dean. During the fourth test, he appeared out of nowhere and offered me help when I needed it most. He did the same thing the night I fled the University. He knew why I was running and asked if I’d be interest
ed in working with him to put an end to The Testing once and for all. The only catch was I had to stay at the University in order to do it.” Michal’s smile is grim. “How could I say no?”
“What happened? Why didn’t his plan work?”
“The plan still hasn’t been put into effect. Symon is slowly building a network of people like me to help bring down The Testing. It’s going slower than he’d like, but we have to be careful, even though some have grown tired of waiting and are demanding action now.”
I stand up straighter. “So what’s the plan?”
“Most of Symon’s network lives in a nonsanctioned colony south of Tosu. They’re passionate about changing the system, but they need people on the inside who can collect information and rally support when the time is right.”
“Right for what?”
“A rebellion.” Michal smiles. “That sounds more dramatic than it will be. If things go as Symon has outlined, most of the United Commonwealth will never realize anything has changed. We will remove Dr. Barnes as the head of The Testing. Once that is done, The Testing will once again be the process the founders of the Commonwealth intended.”
“That sounds simple enough.”
“Not as simple as you might think. When The Testing was established, it was argued that the only way to select the country’s leaders objectively was to make the system separate from the central governing body. The founders wanted to ensure that no one, not even the president, could manipulate the process. It was believed this separation of powers would prevent the detrimental politics of the past from intruding on the government of the future. Instead, it gave the head of Testing and his staff autonomy to run The Testing without oversight or retribution from the central government. In short, Dr. Barnes is free to run The Testing as he sees fit, and under the current law, those who challenge him could be arrested for treason.”
And the penalty for treason is death.
“How does Symon plan on removing Dr. Barnes?”
“Symon’s people are trying to convince the president and the members of the Debate Chamber to propose a new law that will empower them to remove Dr. Barnes and his team from power. Once that is done, officials sympathetic to our cause can lobby to appoint someone we approve as the head of The Testing. We’ll then be able to implement a new method of picking University students. One that doesn’t advocate murder.”
Frustration furrows Michal’s handsome face. “Things have moved more slowly than I’d like, but I prefer Symon’s cautious approach to the option the other rebel faction is pushing for.”
Other faction? “I don’t understand. Aren’t all the rebels working for the same goal?”
“Yes, but not everyone is content to wait for The Testing to end peacefully. Some want to employ any method necessary, even if it means the same kind of bloodshed we oppose.”
My parents taught me that life is precious. I should recoil at the second rebel faction’s plot to kill. But I don’t. “If one person’s death will end The Testing before more candidates die—”
“Dr. Barnes’s death alone will not end The Testing. The system has been designed to continue in the event of the leader’s death. The only way the rebel faction can ensure the end of The Testing through violent means is if Dr. Barnes and all his top administrators die.”