Prologue
Felicity
Not for the first time in my life, I wanted to run away. I’d been thinking about it more and more lately, and right at that moment it seemed like the smartest idea I’d ever had.
That was my problem, though. I had smart ideas, and then a certain blond Adonis biker would smile that smile that never failed to melt me and cock his finger, and I’d forget every damn smart thought I’d ever had. It’s the way it’s always been. I was a sucker for him and he knew it. Had used it against me from the day he’d looked at me as more than his baby sister’s best friend, and I’d broken my number one rule.
“You have that look on your face again,” Raven Hannigan muttered as she walked by the stool where I was sitting.
I shrugged, not really sure what she was talking about and not giving a damn either. It was Saturday night and all I wanted was to be home in bed, to sleep until all this shit was over. I sure as hell didn’t want to be at Hannigans’ bar, waiting on my ex to stop screwing around with one of the sheep long enough for me to tell him what I needed to tell him.
Since I hadn’t told Raven that I’d been sneaking around with her big badass brother—and the MC’s current president—I didn’t mention that to her now. She most likely thought I was sitting there waiting on her to get off work so we could go back to her house and gorge on foods that would go straight to my already fat ass.
Not a bad idea, but I still had to deal with Jet Hannigan first.
Raven tossed a tray full of empty beer bottles into the huge trashcan behind the bar before turning to frown at me. Having Raven Hannigan frown at you was not something most people wanted to happen. If she had been doing it to any other person in the world, they would have probably been about to piss themselves wondering what they had done to get on her bad side. When she frowned at me, I knew she wasn’t debating on whether or not to kick my ass or turn me over to one of her brothers so they could hide the body when they were finished.
This girl was my best friend, the sister of my heart. I wasn’t scared of her simply because I knew she would never harm a hair on my head. That didn’t mean I was ignorant of the fact that she could slit my throat and throw me in the dumpster out back of the bar if she decided that was what she wanted, and no one in the place would even blink. That’s what happened when a girl as strong-willed as Raven was raised by a bunch of badass bikers.
“She has that look on her face again,” a deep voice I knew well muttered as he passed where I was sitting at the bar and went around to where his sister was standing to drop several more empties into the trash. Wiping his hands on the towel that sat behind the bar, Hawk Hannigan turned the same frown his sister had on her beautiful face on me. “You gonna throw up again, Flick?”
I flipped him off as I lifted my glass of club soda to my lips and took a small sip. In truth, my stomach wasn’t at its greatest and it was anyone’s guess when I would vomit again. I’d been doing a lot of that lately.
Morning sickness sucked balls.
It was my turn to frown this time. Sucked balls? Had that thought really just gone through my head? It wasn’t like me to think those things. Raven, sure. Me? If you asked anyone in Hannigans’ right that second what they thought about me, they would instantly tell you that I was sweet and quiet little Flick. The one who needed protecting. The one who was delicate. Fragile, even.
I hated that that was what they thought of me, but even I had to admit it was the truth. I wasn’t as strong as Raven. I was the nice, sweet, quiet girl. I wasn’t fragile though, not nearly as much as everyone assumed, anyway. If so, I would have broken already. I would have been a shattered pile of Felicity on the bar floor that Raven would have had to sweep up and try to put back together, if that were the case.
I was bent a little, lost for sure, but that was all. Nothing had started cracking yet, and as long as I kept my heart hardened against Jet Hannigan, nothing would either.
A high, almost nasal-like giggle drifted over the loud rock music and raised voices in the bar. Saturday nights were always busy at Hannigans’, but even in the current crowd I could pick out her laugh—and his deep chuckle. Bubbles’ annoying me wasn’t anything new. She was a sheep and until Jet had started hooking up with me, she had been one of his favorites. Now that we were over, looked like Jet was back to sniffing around the little bitch.
The sound of his chuckle as it came again had me clenching my jaw along with my thighs. Why did he still have that kind of power over me? How could I not be immune now, when he’d tried so hard to stomp on my heart—and was still trying to do just that?
I turned my head in the direction the laughter was coming from, back toward the Original’s booth. Bubbles was sitting on Jet’s lap, and her hair was covering most of his face
, but even from where I was sitting I could see his eyes and they were zeroed in right on me. He was watching me for a reaction, wanting me to show him I was still able to feel something after the way we’d ended things.
A stab of jealousy churned in my gut, but I didn’t let him see it with so much as a flicker of my lashes. I’d gotten good at hiding my emotions lately.
“She has that look on her face again,” Raider Hannigan grumbled seconds before he sat down at the bar on the empty stool beside me.
Thankful for the distraction, I finally gave in and looked at the three Hannigan siblings. There was no doubt that they were related. They were all exceptionally tall—even Raven with her long, willowy limbs. Each had blond hair and unique green eyes that had an olive-jade tint to them. And they were all the only real family I knew.
“What look?” I demanded, not sure what they were talking about. I’d worked damn hard to make sure my face didn’t reflect how lost I felt on the inside. Had spent hours in the bathroom looking at myself in the mirror as I had perfected the look.
“Dead eyes,” Colt Hannigan answered for his brother as he pushed at the MC member who had been sitting on the other side of me. The older biker stood without a word and Colt took his place, those same green eyes as his brothers and sister trying to penetrate to my core. Colt looked the most like Jet, acted the most like him as well. Meeting his gaze was harder for me to do than it was with the other three Hannigans, but I did just to see what he was talking about.
“No they aren’t,” I argued, but deep down I knew he was probably right. Was that the look I’d perfected? The dead-eyes expression? Damn it. That was worse than the sad, lost look that I was trying to cover up.
“Yes, babe, they are.” Colt reached out and I tried not to flinch away when he pushed a few strands of my hair back from my face. The similarities between Colt and Jet were just too much for me to handle at times. “Where has our happy, free spirited little Flick gone?” he murmured. “I want her back.”
I rolled my eyes, because it was either make this a joke or cry all over the poor biker. “She’s tired. School has been rough this week with midterms and all that crap that goes with them.”
“If that’s the case, then you have nothing to worry about.” Raider took the beer Hawk sat in front of him and lifted it to his lips. “You aced them all, Flick. You’re too damn smart not to have.”
He was right. I was confident in the grades I’d gotten on all the exams that week. I’d studied hard and even though I’d felt sick through most of the tests, I hadn’t stumbled through a single one. School had always come easy for me. It was real life that I seemed to fail at.
“Shouldn’t you four be doing something? Like running this place?” At the harsh snap we all lifted our heads to find Jet standing right behind me.
Without thinking about it, I put up my walls again, and instantly heard three males mutter something under their breaths when they saw my ‘dead eyes’. Jet didn’t look at me though as he glared from one sibling to the next. Some of the bite left his eyes when they skimmed briefly over Raven, though. It was to be expected, I guess. He’d basically raised his baby sister. Raven had considered him her paternal influence long before her father had died.
“I don’t know,” Hawk growled at his older brother. “Shouldn’t you be doing the same? Or would you rather Bubbles sat on your dick all night while we run this fucking place?”