He muttered something vicious and cupped my face in both his hands. “Listen to me, baby. Just listen. Yes, Mia and Lyla went with me to my parents’ house. My mom was home and there with Darcy’s mom, Julia. They were looking at wedding invitations and other shit, and my first instinct was to tell them to pack all of it up and toss it in the trash. But I had to find out if Darcy was pregnant.”
Remembering Mia saying Darcy was pregnant hurt all over again. I closed my eyes and tried to pull away from him, but he kept his hands on my cheeks and leaned in closer, brushing his lips over the tip of my nose. “Yes, she is pregnant, but I swear I haven’t touched her. We hadn’t seen each other in years, baby. That’s the God’s honest truth. From the day I first set eyes on you, no one else existed for me. No one.”
I wanted to believe him, but I couldn’t allow myself to trust him. I’d given in easily the last time, and I refused to
make the same mistake again.
“I know I broke my promise to you about no secrets, and I’m sorry. But you were so torn up over Drake being sick, and I didn’t want to add more stress to you.” He pressed his forehead to mine. “Once I knew what was going on with Darcy and how I figured into her plans, I was going to tell you everything, baby, I swear.”
Clenching my eyes shut, I sucked in a deep breath and slowly released it. Scooting my chair back, I moved so he wasn’t able to touch me and stood. “If you want to stay, you can take the couch. I would say you could have my bed since there is no way I can sleep, but Arella and the others are sound asleep in my room.”
“Baby, tell me you believe me,” he commanded in a voice raspy with emotion.
“I don’t know what to believe right now,” I told him honestly. “And even if I did believe you, you broke your promise. How do I know you won’t do it again and again? I thought that what we had was special. That you loved me the same way I love you, but you’ve shown me just how wrong I was.”
“No! I’m sorry I broke my promise. So fucking sorry. If I could go back and change it, I would. But I can’t.” He stood and reached for me, but when I flinched, his face paled and he dropped his hands. “I love you more than I’ve ever loved anyone, Nevaeh. Baby, please. I need you.”
A sad laugh escaped me, and yet another tear spilled down my cheek. “You don’t need me, Brax. If nothing else, I do know that much.”
“You don’t know anything right now,” he exploded angrily, frustration and devastation pouring off him in waves. Scrubbing his hands over his scruffy jaw, he walked across the kitchen then jerked around to face me. “This whole thing with your dad has gotten your head turned upside down. You’re hurt and pissed, but you’re not thinking straight.”
“Stop using my dad’s illness as an excuse for everything!” I yelled at him. “You fucked up, Braxton. You kept this from me. You broke my heart. None of this has to do with Daddy being sick or having surgery or anything else. It’s on you and no one else.”
“Baby, we can work this out. Just give me a chance. I’ll fix this. P-please, Kitten.”
When his voice cracked, my heart shattered a little more. I wanted to hug him, tell him it was all going to be okay, but we both knew that was a lie. It wasn’t okay. Nothing between us was now, and it never would be again.
Chapter 21
Braxton
My eyes burned with unshed tears as I watched the love of my life stumble back and then take off running.
Away from me.
Unsteady on my feet, somehow I made it back to the table and slumped into a chair before putting my head in my hands and letting the tears fall.
I was losing her.
She was right. This was all on me. I’d fucked up royally, and now I had no clue how to fix it. But I needed the chance to try. Because I couldn’t live without her. I didn’t even want to consider the possibility.
The tears kept falling, but I didn’t wipe them away. I couldn’t even move, frozen in place by the fear that I’d lost the only truly good thing I’d ever gotten to call mine. I sat there for a long time, just crying and trying to come up with a solution to fix what I had broken.
The timer on the stove finally stirred me, and I got up on autopilot to turn off the alarm. Behind me, I heard someone coming into the kitchen at the same time my phone rang. I pulled it from my pocket as I turned to watch Nevaeh cross toward me.
“This is Braxton.” I answered the phone without checking to see who it was first.
“Brax.” Lyla’s strained voice filled my ear, and I immediately went on alert. A look at the digital clock on the stove said it was after five in the morning Pacific time, which meant it was after eight in Virginia.
“Lyla?” I strained to hear anything in the background, worried about my cousin. Then I realized she would have called Howler before me if she were in danger since she knew both Barrick and I were on the West Coast. “What’s wrong?”
“The tail you put on Darcy just dropped off a file since Barrick told him you were unavailable. I looked at it… I know I shouldn’t have, but I couldn’t stop myself. And I kind of wish I hadn’t. I can’t unsee what I just saw.” She was rambling, and that was completely unlike her, so I knew it must be something that had really upset her. “Ah fuck, I wish I could unsee that shit.”
I felt Nevaeh’s gaze and looked at her. Her face was pale, her blue-gray eyes swollen and red-rimmed, telling me she’d been crying for a while. Yet her brows were lifted, concern on her face for my cousin.
Clenching my free hand into a fist to keep myself from reaching for Neveah, I tried to focus on Lyla. “Ly, maybe you should just tell me what you can’t unsee, sweetheart. You’re kind of rambling right now and not making much sense.”
“Yeah, okay.” She sucked in a deep breath then released it slowly. “Okay,” she said again. “So, the guy tailed Darcy for the past two weeks and finally caught her meeting up with the man I’m assuming is her baby daddy. Ugh. It’s so gross, Brax. Like, I seriously want to vomit right now.”