How the fuck was I going to handle watching him with her the next nine weeks, I didn’t know, but it was going to be a real test of my restraint and ambition to move higher in the rock world. If I did something stupid, like say kill Emmie Armstrong’s number-one road manager, then it could be disastrous for my music career and Tainted Knights’ ever-rising success would suddenly disappear.
“So, the bus,” Kassa spoke up when Travis asked if we had any questions. “How is the whole sleeping area set up?”
Travis’s eyes seemed to light up, but I wasn’t sure if it was because of the question she had asked or if he was just happy to hear himself talk for a little longer. “It would probably be easier if I drew you a layout of the bus to help you understand it better.”
My fists, already clenched at my sides, turned white, and I gritted my teeth so hard that one of them protested with a sharp pain through my jaw. Travis moved in closer to Kassa and took her notebook. Then he started sketching the layout of the bus. He told her about the driver’s seat, the living and kitchenette area, and the bathroom.
“There are eight bunks,” he said with a wink. “So you don’t have to share, but I’m up for company any time you get lonely.”
I jerked to my feet and left the room before I scared Kassa and killed the man. In the kitchen, I punched the refrigerator door, slicing my knuckles open and leaving a dent in the metal. Behind me, I heard Kassa blow out a resigned sigh and realized she had followed after me.
“Are you bleeding?” she muttered, crossing the space between us and taking my injured hand in hers.
“Does it fucking matter?”
Her eyebrows lifted at my petulant tone, but she continued to ignore the dangerous sparks flying from my eyes. “You’re lucky you didn’t break your hand, dumbass,” she scolded me as she opened the freezer and removed a bag of fries.
I let out a hiss when she put the frozen potatoes on my knuckles, but I didn’t pull away.
“You’re so transparent it’s not even funny,” she muttered so softly that I had to strain to hear her. “You say you only want my friendship, but you’re so possessive and jealous I can’t even talk to another guy without you losing your shit.”
“I say a lot of stupid things,” I bit out.
A small grin teased at her lips. “Believe me, I know that more than anyone.”
With my free hand, I caught her hip and pulled her in close, letting her freely feel how much she affected me. Her eyes were trapped by my own, so I saw the way her irises instantly dilated, felt the change in her breathing, and knew that she still wanted me just as much as I wanted her.
“I’m not saying stupid things now, Kassa.”
Her teeth sank into her bottom lip, and I had to bite a groan back because I was desperate to taste that lip.
“Maybe not now,” she said, “but you will as soon your blood cools down.” She stepped back, giving me a sad but determined smile. “We’re friends, Gray. Best friends. That was what you wanted, and that’s what I’m going to give you.”
“I didn’t understand what I wanted before, baby. All I knew was that I couldn’t stand hurting you because I knew I would fuck up and break your heart.”
Her chin trembled, driving me insane because I knew she was fighting tears, but her voice was strong when she spoke. “Nothing’s changed.”
I tossed the frozen fries in the direction of the sink and followed her when she backed away from me. Her back hit the counter beside the fridge, and I put my hands on the countertop, boxing her in.
“Everything has changed,” I breathed beside her ear as I kissed her jaw. “Now, I know I won’t ever hurt you because I’ve proved to myself I can be faithful to you.”
Her hands pressed against my chest, but she didn’t try hard to push me away. We both knew that, if she really wanted me to move, all she had to do was say the words and I would step back.
“Gray, I can’t do this, whatever this is. Not again. You nearly broke my heart, and—”
“I won’t do that again,” I vowed. “I was scared before, baby. I didn’t want to chance losing you if I fucked this up. But I know I won’t hurt you.”
“How?” she demanded, pissed at me now, but I would happily take her pissed over ready to cry any day. “How do you know you won’t hurt me? What’s changed?”
“I’ve changed. Hell, Kas, I sleep beside you every fucking night. What do you think that means?”
“That you’re too attached and can’t sleep without me.”
“Yes, I’m goddamned attached. It’s more than that and you know it. I’m obsessed with you. But, if I’m sleeping with you, it’s kind of hard for me to be out fucking around, don’t you think?”
Her lashes lowered, blocking me out as she turned her head to look at something over my shoulder. “I … I just assumed you were getting what you wanted before you came home.”
“Hell no.” I roughly pushed my lower body against hers, letting her feel the full force of my aching cock, and got even harder when I heard her soft gasp. “The only time I’ve gotten off in the past years is when I’ve jerked myself off in the shower.”