“Nothing,” I bit out. “Thanks for the sandwich and cookies.” Glancing at Patty, who was eating up every moment of our exchange, I forced a smile. “See you next time, Miss Patty.”
“Sure thing, hon. Tell your mom I said hi.”
Bag in hand, I stomped out of the deli and was at my car before Ben caught up with me. “Lexa, what just happened back there?” he demanded, catching my car door in his hands as I flung it open and tossed everything into the passenger seat.
Before I could get in, he was around the door and grasping hold of my arm in a firm enough grip to hold me in place without hurting me. “Hey, talk to me, baby. I feel like I’m walking in an active minefield right now, and trust me, I know from experience that isn’t fun.”
“I’m not joining the Ben Davis fan club,” I told him point-blank, glaring up into his handsome face. “Apparently, it already has plenty of members, so you don’t need one more.” Jerking my arm free, I got into my car.
“What fan club? For fuck’s sake, Lexa, what the hell are you talking about?” he demanded, so frustrated, he scrubbed his hands over his face. “Why are you so mad at me?”
“How many times have you hooked up since coming to town, Ben?” I whisper-shouted.
His jaw turned to stone. “Why does that matter?”
“It just does!”
Scratching at the scruff on his jaw, he groaned. “I don’t know. A few, maybe. That was before I became sheriff, though. It was before I met you. Not one of them lasted longer than a few nights.”
“Just like I won’t last more than a few nights,” I concluded. My heart started to throb in my chest, and my eyes stung with tears I wasn’t going to let spill free.
“No!” He exploded. “How did we go from me buying you dinner, to you accusing me of sleeping with all the people I’ve changed tires for, to you thinking we wouldn’t last?”
“It’s a logical chain of thought to reach the right conclusion. I’m not like everyone else. I’m not going to hop into bed with you just because you bought me dinner.”
“I didn’t expect you to.” Crouching down, he took my hand and brought it to his lips, kissing my palm. “Miss Patty was telling you the gossip, am I right?” Something in my eyes must have told him just how right he was. “I’ve changed a few tires for women, Lexa. But not nearly as many as everyone says I have. And honestly, I don’t know how changing tires for women who don’t even carry around a jack went straight to me taking them to bed. I’m the sheriff. It’s my responsibility to help anyone in need. I haven’t slept with any of them, though. I swear to you.”
His tongue touched the center of my palm, and I felt myself melting. The raging jealousy that was making me see red and unable to think straight started to clear, and I realized I’d just acted like a crazy girlfriend. But I couldn’t ever be Ben’s girlfriend, even if I wanted it more than anything.
“I believe you,” I told him, knowing I should pull my hand free but unable to bring myself to do so.
Relief filled his eyes. “Let me go get my food and pay, and we can go somewhere and talk.”
“I can’t. My parents are expecting me.” Reluctantly, I pulled away, already missing his touch, his lips on my skin. “I have to go.”
“Okay. I’m not going to make you.” His huge left hand touched my thigh. “Give me your number so I can call you later.”
“Ben, we can’t do this.” And I needed to remind myself of all the reasons why we couldn’t do this. Whatever the hell “this” was.
“Lexa, I need to hear your voice before I go to sleep tonight.” His fingers caressed up my thigh before slowly moving back down. I moaned at how much I wanted him to go higher, but his hand stayed where it was. “Or I’m going to show up at your house and climb the drainpipe and sneak in to your room. Then I’m going to have to arrest myself for breaking and entering. You don’t want that, do you, baby?”
Gulping, I grabbed the pen out of the cupholder and turned his hand over. I believed he would do it. But worse than that, part of me wanted him to sneak in to my bedroom. And do so many naughty things to me.
My fingers shook as I wrote my number on his palm. “I really have to go now.”
“Okay. Drive carefully.” His thumb brushed over my inner thigh and, even through my jeans, my skin felt scorched.
“Thanks again for dinner,” I told him as he straightened and stepped back.
“Hopefully next time, we can eat together.” Winking down at me, he shut the door.
As I backed out of the parking space, he lifted his hand, his gaze following me hungrily. Biting my lip, I waved back.
No matter how much I told him and myself that this thing between us couldn’t go anywhere, that it was dangerous, I kept falling deeper and deeper into the pit and giving in a little more every time I saw him.
I was totally fucked, and if I wasn’t careful, it was going to get him killed.
Chapter 4