To just be near him.
He had more than a few days of scruff on his jaw, and I wondered if he was growing out a beard. I liked it on him. A lot. And I couldn’t help imagining how his facial hair would feel against my cheek when he kissed me. But the dark circles under his eyes distracted me from that train of thought, and I couldn’t help thinking he’d been getting about as much sleep as I had during the time I’d been gone.
Then the person he was with shifted, and all I saw was a cloud of lustrous blond hair. My concern for Ben died a sudden and painful death as I watched her put her hand on the one of his that was wrapped around his mug of coffee, just as I heard a husky, flirty laugh come from her. And he didn’t pull away. My gaze zeroed in on her touching him, and what Aunt Quinn said earlier finally made sense.
“He’s not alone. He hasn’t been alone for over a week now.”
Did that mean he was with the blonde now? As in with her, with her?
Whatever the blonde was saying had Ben’s lips lifting in a half smile, and I felt like someone had punched me dead center in the chest.
When I left for New York, I’d gone to clear my head and put what I was feeling for Ben into perspective. I hadn’t really thought about what he would be up to while I was gone. He seemed so into me, the thought of him moving on while I was away just didn’t enter my head.
But it should have.
Because obviously, he had.
Suddenly, I couldn’t quite catch my breath. He’d moved on so easily, while I’d been losing my mind just trying to stop thinking about him twenty-four seven. The guilt I felt only mounted each day because I couldn’t stop what I was feeling, and I felt like I was letting everyone in my family down because of it.
Meanwhile, he was back here in Creswell Springs getting on with his life, while I was stuck in some damn limbo.
If I was so forgettable, maybe he’d been trying to use me after all.
Realizing that made me feel sick, and I turned away from the sight of the guy I realized I wasn’t going to stop caring about just because I had to. Walking back toward the office, I passed Aunt Quinn.
“Lexa—”
“I have work to do,” I said in a tone devoid of all emotion. “And I’m not hungry, so please don’t waste food I’m not going to eat.”
“Honey, I’m sorry,” she tried to soothe, but I knew if she hugged me, I would cry.
Chapter 10
Ben
Paige brushed her hand over mine, finally releasing me after Campbell got up from his table three booths to my right.
“Why do I feel dirty whenever that creep is around?” she hissed as she sat back, picking up her cup of coffee and taking a leisurely sip.
I grunted, but as she sat back, clearing my field of vision, a flash of dark hair caught my attention and the air suddenly seemed to be trapped in my chest.
Lexa.
And she was walking away.
“Ben!” Paige called after me, but I was already chasing after Lexa. “Where the hell are you going?”
“Go back to my office. I’ll be there when I finish here,” I tossed over my shoulder.
“Sheriff,” Quinn greeted as I caught sight of Lexa’s hair again, this time going into the back of the diner where the office was. “I wouldn’t recommend it.”
I didn’t even spare her a glance as I jogged down the little hall and pushed open the office door just as it started to swing closed in my face.
The first thing I noticed was how tense her shoulders were, and I wrapped my arms around her from behind, pulling her back hard against my front as I buried my face in her neck. She stiffened in my arms as I inhaled her scent like it was the first breath of air I’d had in weeks.
“No!” she cried and savagely jerked out of my arms to face me. “Don’t touch me.”
Ignoring the fire in her eyes telling me to keep my distance, I cupped her face in both hands. She had on makeup, but I wasn’t sure I liked it because it was hiding her natural beauty.