She sighed. “I’m so very proud of you. You have no idea.”
No, I don’t. “Just take the box with you downstairs. I’ll come by and get it.”
“What’s in it?”
I bit down onto the inside of my cheek. “Just stuff I need. I meant to pack it. Then I can figure out why it stinks and you won’t have to deal with the smell anymore. How’s that sound?”
She sighed. “Okay. I’ll take it downstairs with me.”
“Thank you.”
“Oh, do you have your list of questions you wanted to
ask during your orientation?”
I paused. “That’s what’s in the box.”
I fucking hope she bought my lie and didn’t try to open the damn thing.
“Ah, well. Come get it, then. Anything else you need from your room?”
I shook my head. “I’ll take one last look at it before I leave. I promise. Okay? And I’ll give you a big hug.”
“I’d like that very much.”
I hung up the phone and sighed. I stood up from the bed as Allison eyed me carefully, then reached for my bag. I slipped my phone into my pocket as we silently walked downstairs. I heard Michael and Clint talking to Allison’s parents, promising they’d take good care of us.
Normally, I’d interject with a quip of some sort.
But I was too focused on getting back to the house.
Michael gave Allison a big hug, but I slipped by Clint. I wanted to get out of there. I needed to, really. I tossed my stuff into the back of the car, then hopped in. I waited impatiently for the three of them to make their way back to me. Everyone climbed in silently as Allison waved at her parents. Clint climbed over me, seating himself next to the window before he took my hand.
“Everything okay?” he asked.
“Michael, can we go back to my house for a minute? I left something.”
I tossed Clint a knowing look and he sighed. I snickered to myself and Michael drove to my place, and I quickly hopped out of the car. I motioned for Clint to stay behind. I didn't want anyone to witness this. Because if something broke out between my mother and me, I didn’t want anyone bearing witness to it.
I was tired of everyone seeing the destitution of my life.
“Hey there, sweetheart.”
Mom rushed me the second I walked in the door and hugged me tight.
“Hey, Mom.”
She kissed my cheek. “The box is on the kitchen table. And I packed a couple of sodas for you and everyone else for the road.”
“Thanks.”
I walked into the kitchen and sighed with relief. There was the box. With the lock on the front of it. It didn’t look tampered with. Or as if it had been broken. So I scooped it up before reaching for the shoulder-strapped cooler. I nodded at Mom with a taut smile on my lips, then quickly made my way upstairs.
I should’ve done this a long time ago anyway.
I locked my bedroom door behind me and started whirling around my room. I picked up one of the larger bags I’d kept from Cecilia’s stash and started stuffing it with all sorts of things. The box. The underwear. I pulled out my dresser drawer of panties and dug all the way to the bottom. Until my hand fell against the white envelope. I shoved that into the purse. I picked up my piggy bank and put that in there, too. I reached above my closet with a yardstick I kept in the closet and scraped along its shelf top until two tied-off socks fell in my face. I stuffed those in the purse, too, before gazing around the room.
And when my eyes fell to my bed, I sighed.