I snickered. “You were right. You and Allison, about different things. I was jealous of Clint. I am jealous of Clint, really. He had the guts to admit that he didn’t want to go to college, despite what others might’ve thought. I was jealous that he had at least an inkling of an idea of what he might do after high school. Even if that idea was what he wouldn't do.”
Allison furrowed her brow. “But you’ve always wanted to go to college.”
I shook my head. “No, I’ve always wanted to get out of here. And I figured school was a good enough excuse. I could save up, get a place of my own. With you.”
I nodded toward Allison before drawing in a deep breath.
“Get our own place near wherever you went to college so we could keep rooming together. And then, you and Michael happened. Me and Clint happened. Plans got turned over on their head and it didn’t become an issue of where I’d go to college, but how I would afford getting away from here on my own. I didn’t see the issue like that, but that’s what it really was.”
Michael sipped his drink. “Why couldn't you just talk about it?”
I shrugged. “I didn’t know it was an issue. Or, at least I didn’t know the core of the issue. I was treating the topical issues that kept falling apart, but not the underlying issue. Because Allison’s right; college was always the plan. And I thought that deviating away from that plan meant that I had somehow failed my teachers. And myself. And you guys. And my father, somehow.”
Clint slid his hand over my knee. “You could never be a disappointment.”
Allison nodded. “He’s right. You've been difficult. But you’ve never disappointed us.”
I looked over at Michael and he leaned back in his chair.
“So I take it you’re not going to Cal State then?”
I shook my head. “No, I’m not. I’ve already contacted the enrollment office and told them I wouldn't be enrolling in this semester.”
Michael nodded. “So you’re going next semester?”
I looked over at Clint and smiled. “I don't know yet.”
Allison’s eyebrows rose. “And you’re okay with that?”
Clint nodded. “Are you okay with that?”
My eyes panned back to Michael. “Yeah, I’m okay with that. I have an idea of what I want to do. But it’s still a rough plan. What I know is that college isn’t the way for me to get out of this place. I don’t know what the right way is, but I do know what the wrong way is. Just like Clint knew what the wrong way was for him.”
Clint squeezed my knee. “We’ll figure it out.”
I nodded. “Like we always do.”
And as we all stared down Michael, I watched a grin crawl across his face.
“Anyone interested in hitting the beach tomorrow? It’s supposed to be a very sunny day.”
I leapt out of my chair and hugged him as Allison started laughing.
“Yes, yes, and even more yes,” I said.
It felt good to have my family back.
Epilogue
Raelynn
Three Months Later
As I gazed out the window of the café, I watched the tourists walk by. The massive plaza that sprawled out before my eyes housed one of the most incredible fountains I’d ever seen. My cappuccino was the best I’d ever tasted.
Then again, most of the food in Rome tasted better than anything I’d ever had before.
I smiled at the children that walked by. They waved at me through the window and I waved back. Mothers smiled at me. Husbands that walked by nodded their heads. Locals stood out on the street, flooding the corners of the city with their music.