I got lost in my memories for a second. And I didn’t get pulled from them until our milkshakes touched down. I nodded at the waitress and she left us be, then I felt something warm against my foot under the table.
And when I looked underneath, I found Rae wrapping her legs around mine. Trying to comfort me. Trying to cradle me. Trying to be there for me.
No one had ever done that for me before. I felt my heart leap to life.
“No, I don’t have any memories of my dad. According to Mom, he wasn’t even around much when they were together. I mean, they got engaged. Got married. Had me. But, for some reason, he jumped ship when I was three and that was that.”
I sighed. “Did your mother ever tell you what happened?”
Rae shook her head. “I can’t get her to talk about it. Like, ever. I don’t know that I’ll ever know what really happened. Why Dad really left us. Why he really didn’t want us.”
“I’m sure it wasn’t that.”
“Are you, though? I mean, it’s possible. Mom’s not easy to deal with. My grandparents disowned us, practically, because of her erratic behavior. For all I know, Dad got fed up with it and was worried I’d turn out the same way. So he left to avoid all that.”
I reached out, taking her hand. “You don’t seem erratic to me.”
She snickered. “Oh, yeah? And sleeping with the high school bully on a whim after he got into a fight with my best friend isn’t erratic?”
“You make it sound like that’s a bad thing. Was it really that bad of a thing?”
And as our plates of food settled in front of us, Rae shook her head.
“No. It really wasn’t.”
19
Raelynn
Clint grinned at me from across the table before he let go of my hand. We dove into the food, sinking our teeth into fabulous, greasy burgers that made me moan with delight. There was an extravagant amount of food. But I knew I’d eat it all. In some ways, I forgot Clint was sitting there. Watching me. Staring at me. Taking in the way ketchup slid across my cheeks and how the lettuce slid away from my burger, dropping onto the plate.
“If you cut it in half, the vegetables will stay better.”
I slowly looked over at him as I found myself mid-bite into my glorious burger.
“Oh, yeah?” I asked with my mouth full.
He chuckled. “Yep.”
He held up half of his burger and I put mine down. I wiped off my face as his eyes danced along me, watching my every move. I wasn't sure what the hell he was staring at, but I didn’t like it. I’d never been underneath someone’s gaze so intently, and it made me squirm in my seat. I picked up my knife, cutting the burger in half before I picked up the part of it I had already been chewing on.
And I found that the vegetables didn’t slip out as easily.
I smiled. “Genius.”
“I’ve eaten many burgers in my lifetime. I’ve perfected the art.”
I shook my head. “There’s no art to eating them. There’s only the art of cleaning yourself up after them.”
“That an art you’ve perfected?”
“You making fun of the way I eat, Clarke?”
He winked. “Maybe just a bit.”
I rolled my eyes. “A teaser, even on a date. How romantic.”
“I mean, we could share our milkshakes if you wanted. Get two straws. Nuzzle our noses together and feed each other cherries.”