At first, Tate had been too shocked to connect with her declaration. She’d made promises to him when they first got together. She’d vowed that he wasn’t second best. She’d sworn that she had let Koby go, too angry at him to consider claiming him anyway.
She’d lied.
Once the shock wore off, a freezing-cold burn had spread through his body and iced his blood, numbing him to everything, shrouding him in apathy. He hadn’t raged, ranted, or even talked it out with anyone. Instead, he’d thrown himself into the Beta role and allowed his friends and family to distract him. Tate hadn’t been willing to let the breakup eat him whole. He hadn’t been willing to spend even a moment’s time grieving the loss of a person who’d already wasted a year of his life.
People had watched him closely, expecting him to unravel. But he hadn’t. Not even when, a month after he moved out of her apartment, the imprinting threads snapped. It had felt like drowning. Drowning in pain, emotion, nausea, exhaustion—waves of which had hit him at random times and pulled him under. But he’d always resurfaced, and the nightmare eventually ended.
When the numbness finally wore off, some anger had crept in. He couldn’t blame her for wanting her true mate, but Tate was pissed that she’d made him so many empty promises. He’d let that anger go for his own sake, though. There was no sense in clinging to that kind of dark emotion.
“You don’t think it would be hard for you to have her around?” asked Vinnie.
“No,” replied Tate. “She’s part of my past—a regrettable part. That’s it.”
“And what if she wants you two to try again?”
“It won’t happen. If I wanted her back, I could have had her back.” Four months after they separated, she’d turned up at his old apartment, begging him to take her back. He’d instantly suspected what he later learned—Koby had refused to accept her. More, the grieving male had claimed he’d never want her.
Tate felt pity for her now, but back then he’d felt only anger that she’d think so little of him as to ask that he take her back after all she’d done … like he should so easily forgive her betrayal and, moreover, be content with being second best. Well, he wasn’t. So he’d turned her away, and she’d hauled ass out of the pride the day after that.
“Does she know Koby switched to his brother’s pride?” Tate asked, because it was possible that she was returning to try to again claim the man.
“According to Priscilla, yes, Ashlynn knows and has apparently given up on him.” Vinnie twisted his mouth. “You’re so sure that you’ve really moved on from her? You built walls after she left. You haven’t been as open to trusting women since then. You’ve never allowed yourself to really connect with anyone. Maybe you still feel something for her.”
Neither Tate nor his cat were so trusting these days, but … “I moved past what happened. It’s neither here nor there to me if she comes back.” He felt nothing for her now. Not even a twinge of emotion. There was nothing to feel. As if his system had purged itself of her in every sense of the word.
Vinnie pursed his lips. “All right. But if you’re truly over the woman, you need to stop letting what happened affect how you live your life. You’re giving your past too much power over your present and future—that’s never going to end well. You’ll just keep sabotaging your own happiness.”
Tate frowned. “I’m not doing that.”
“Aren’t you?” Vinnie softly challenged. “You seemed happy enough with the devil shifter. Yet, you walked away from her.”
“She was the one who walked away.”
“Oh, I see. Well, I can’t say I blame her, considering the relationship wasn’t going anywhere. She’s done the best thing for both of you.”
Yeah, so she’d claimed. But “the best thing” didn’t feel best. And Tate didn’t believe it was the only reason she walked away. No, there was more to it than that, and he didn’t think it was unreasonable of him to have wanted the full truth.
“I’ll let Koby know Ashlynn’s coming back, just in case he wishes to come and see her,” said Vinnie. “But it’s unlikely he will. Even if he has come to believe that she’s his true mate, I can’t envision him wanting to do anything about it. Gita was his world and there’s no replacing a woman who touches you that deeply. Having experienced a fully formed imprint bond, he may not be able to truly mate again. The soul generally doesn’t choose to go there twice.”
Some people claimed they’d heard of instances where widowed shifters could mate again, but Tate believed they were bullshit. After all, if the rumors were true, they’d come complete with names and specific details to give grieving shifters hope. “Do you wish you could bond with another female?”