“I’m here, Beau.” What could he be dreaming about?
“Down!” He jackknifes up in bed, looking around as if he’s a bit disoriented before rolling and pinning me under him. His breathing is heavy, like he just ran a marathon.
“Beau. It’s okay. I’m here.” I slowly reach my hand out to turn on the lamp. He stares down at me, blinking. “I’m here.” I reach up and cup his face in my hands. “You’re okay. Everything is okay.” I keep my voice steady even though I’m scared. Not of him but of whatever it is that is haunting him in his dreams. His eyes close with a pained look before he drops down, burying his face in my neck. I run my hands up and down his back. He relaxes more.
My eyes burn with tears at the knowledge that he’s letting me take care of him. He’s not trying to flee the room and shut me out. He’ll never know how much it means to me that he stays with me, not hiding this from me.
“My dream girl,” he breathes into my neck.
“Because you dream of me?” I ask.
He nods his head. “You were there that night. When the world exploded around me all I could see was you. You were standing right in front of me.” I swallow hard, my emotions threatening to overwhelm me. “I fought to get to you. In reality I think I was fighting to live so I could come back to you. I knew I couldn’t leave this earth without you knowing how I felt about you.”
The damn finally breaks. Tears begin to stream down my face. He lifts his head to look at me.
“Beau.” I reach up, needing to touch his face. He doesn't pull away from my touch but leans into it. I know in this moment Beau might have fought this pull he had to me at first, but those days are long gone. I understand now. He has been fighting his own demons. Ones that I will never fully understand, but I want to try. For him I’d try anything.
“When I finally woke up in the hospital, I was screaming your name. My head was so fucked up. I really thought you’d been out there with me.”
“Not physically, but I’ve always been with you, Beau. From the moment you walked into my life you’ve had a piece of my heart.”
“You’re so damn sweet. You know that.” He leans down, brushing his mouth against mine. “Too sweet for me.”
I smile against his mouth. “Why did it take you so long to claim me?” I ask. I know there is the age thing, but I’m twenty-one now. He rolls, taking me with him as he pushes up to lean against the headboard with me straddling him.
“I think I’ve been making plans for a long time. Take this place for example.”
“I love this place.” He runs his hands up my back.
“I knew I had to deal with the demons in my head. A week after the accident, my team went back out again with a new squad leader.” He closes his eyes for a second. “Most of them didn't make it back from that mission.” I can see how deeply that affects him.
“Beau.” I rest my hand over his heart, wishing I could take away some of his pain and bear it for him.
“I blamed myself. If I hadn’t been in the hospital, I would have been with them. Things could have ended differently.”
“You’re right. You could have died too,” I point out. “You can’t play the what-if game in life. It will only drive you crazy. You have to move forward, and I’m willing to help you do that in any way I can.”
“I know. You want to know what’s fucked up? This past week all I have been able to think is I’m lucky I hadn't been there because then I might not be here right now. Finally getting something I’ve wanted for longer than I should have.”
“I love you, Beau.”
His grip on my hips tightens. “Say it again.”
“I love you.” He starts to lift, and I know he’s going to pin me to the bed, but I press on his chest, stopping him. He lifts his brows. “Let me, love.” I press a kiss on his chest and then another as I slip off his lap. I kiss every scar as I make my way down his body, wrapping my hand around his cock.
“Do not tease me.” He thrusts up into my hand. A bead of cum drips from the head of his cock. I lick my lips, ready to taste him.
“I don’t want to tease you.” I lower my head as Beau fists the sheets in his hands. I circle the head of his cock with my tongue, tasting his salty sweetness. He lets out a loud groan that pushes some of my shyness away as I suck him into my mouth. I take him as deep as I can, getting more aroused by the second.