“Let me do this for you.”
I gave in, and X guided me to his private jet. I’d seen images of the inside, and I knew the names of his pilot and crew, but I never thought I’d actually fly in it.
It was even more luxurious in person than it had looked in the pictures I’d seen. I’d only flown a few times in my life—most of the things I knew about the world I knew from seeing them through the computer. I did know that seats in commercial first class had absolutely nothing on the awesome chairs in X’s plane. They reclined all the way, they swiveled, and they had amazing lumbar support. When I sank into one of them, it felt as good as the top-of-the-line gaming chair in my apartment.
As X talked with the crew members, my mind went to all the things that could go wrong, all the things I hadn’t taken care of.
If we could have stopped at my apartment, I could have quickly packed enough clothes for a week or two on X’s island. I hadn’t bothered with more than one change of clothes because clothes were easily replaceable. Maybe I’d get lucky and my enemies wouldn’t destroy everything. I really hoped they didn’t torch the place. The last thing I wanted was for my neighbors to be in danger.
X stepped into the main cabin and frowned. “What’s wrong?”
“I was just thinking about my apartment and hoping no harm comes to any of my neighbors.”
“I’ve got men watching your building. Everything is going to be fine.”
“You’re protecting the whole building?”
“Yes. Hopefully my men got there in time to protect all your belongings. There was no sign of forced entry at your apartment.”
“You’ve been to my apartment?” I was horrified to think X, who was always perfectly put together even when he was charging armed men, had seen the stacks of energy drink cans and piles of clothes on the floor.
“Not me personally. I wish I could have traveled back to Boston, then rejoined you that fast. Instantaneous travel sure would make this job easier. Both my jobs. Both my lives.”
Of course I knew that. He’d been with me almost the entire time since I’d shown up at his house. “What’s it like living two lives?”
X sighed and tipped his head back against the comfortable seat. I didn’t think he was actually going to answer, but eventually, he did.
“I’ve learned to compartmentalize everything. I wouldn’t have survived my time as a Ranger without that skill. But it’s not fun if that’s what you’re thinking. It… sucks.”
“So you’re not really living in a fairy tale or a superhero movie?”
He smiled. “There are days like that, but I’m always working, always playing a role.”
“Then why do it?”
“Because I care about my family, about our legacy, about how much good we can do if we put the time into it.”
“But you don’t take time to celebrate the good you do.” X’s eyes widened. He hadn’t expected me to notice that. “Like yesterday. You took out Swain, something you’ve been trying to do for a long time, but as soon as that was over, you were right onto the next thing.”
“Do you do that?” he asked. “Stop and take time to celebrate?”
I laughed. “Fuck no. Basically my work is my life, so I don’t really…”
“That won’t be the case when we’re away.”
I knew that, and I was nervous as fuck about it. Without work to do for clients, I wouldn’t know what to do with myself. I sucked at small talk, though talking to X was easier than talking to most of the people I’d encountered in the last few years. With as little as I tended to see the sun, I’d burn to a crisp in no time on the beach or by the pool. “I do have my laptop, so—”
“You’re not putting yourself in danger. You could use some fresh air as much as I could.”
“I… um… I’m not sure I actually like fresh air, and I don’t think it likes me.”
He snorted. “Being outside on the island is nothing like being outside in Boston.”
“I know. I mean, I know in theory. I’ve never been to an island. Okay, that’s not true. I’ve been to Mt. Desert Island in Maine, but I’ve never been to a tropical island.”
X started to say something, but the pilot’s voice came over the speaker, letting us know he’d been cleared for takeoff.
After we locked our seats into place and buckled up, the engines roared, and the plane began to speed down the runway faster and faster. When we started to lift off, my stomach dropped and I squeezed my eyes shut. X laid his warm hand on my arm.
“Just breathe.”
I tried to, but I could only manage shallow pants. I didn’t really like being out of my apartment, and I sure as hell didn’t like being up in the air.