I made an appointment with the doctor just to check on the progress of my pregnancy and hopefully get some kind of anti-nausea pills. I was a wreck and could hardly keep anything down, even water. The two weeks with Amir, I’d been almost fine, better than fine, and hadn’t felt at all sick, but now that he was gone and I wasn’t sleeping again.
Just as I suspected, my body must have agreed with my mind in the area of having babies.
I was going to keep this child though; I had to. For now though, I decided on full steam ahead with my previous plans. I set my jaw on the simple fact I was once again alone and fending entirely for myself, and I really couldn’t count on anyone to help. Although I did arrange to have lunch with Melinda, my best friend’s mother.
Melinda Potts practically raised me alongside her daughter Anna, so to me, it made sense she might help me through the uncharted waters of my first pregnancy. My first? Oh God, I can’t believe I’m thinking in those terms. But, Melinda is a wonderful and caring woman, even if she tends to be a bit of a recluse. Although since Anna married, her husband Richard has become more attentive, and Anna says her mother seems to be happier than she could ever remember.
***
After another sleepless night and morning of dry heaves, I dragged my weary self to the doctor and he gave me two arm bands meant to press on the pressure points on my wrists. They reported
ly suppress motion sickness and morning sickness—I would try anything to stop the onslaught of debilitating nausea!
Arm bands firmly in place and denting the insides of my wrists, I met with Melinda at one of her favorite downtown bistros. Her beaming face was like a balm to my tired and lonely heart and we soon got into an easy conversation. I told her about Amir, and she caught me up on Anna, who was now almost into her second trimester of pregnancy.
“Oh she’s doing fine now. Said the morning sickness stopped about a week ago—just after they noticed her bump had grown considerably. Here is a picture…”
She pulled out her phone and showed me. My best friend in the whole world is grinning from ear to ear with her hands lovingly cradling her much larger abdomen.
“Isn’t she beautiful? I am so proud of her.”
I masked my unease and pet at my own stomach. I’ve always been tall and skinny and the thought of losing my flat belly still made me uneasy.
“She always wanted this—from as far back as I could remember, she wanted to have kids and be a mommy.” I detected my own tone and cringed. I sounded rueful and depressed.
Melinda took my hand from across the table.
“Jules, just come and live with me. You know we have more than enough room. I rattle around in that brownstone all by myself most of the time. Richard spends more time in New York than Boston. You could have your own floor. The nursery needs some work, but it’s actually still a nursery. I think of you as a daughter, too; I’d love to help you with this.”
I wrinkled my nose, “Really? I mean, it seems like too much to ask of anyone.”
She nodded earnestly, “It’s not too much to ask of an old lady who’s lonely and misses her daughter.” She furrowed her brow, “The only problem is that I plan on being with Anna in Dubai when she is due. You’ll be alone for at least a month, maybe two.” Then her tone brightened and she grinned. “I’ll be back just in time for your birth! And on the bright side, I’ll be all practiced and learned up for you!”
I smiled and pondered the whole situation yet again as I stabbed at my salad. “I am really tired,” I offered.
“Jules, you shouldn’t be expected to do this alone. I know Anna would insist you live with us if she were still here.” Her voice changed to a concerned tone, “Why has he abandoned you? I do not understand why he left.”
“Oh no! It’s not him, Melinda. Amir is—well—he’s…” I couldn’t seem to find the words to explain.
“It’s me. Not him. He has already provided me with financial backing. You wouldn’t have to pick up any of the expenses. I just need a place where I’m not alone.”
“Then come home, darling girl. Come home to me, and I’ll take care of you.”
Chapter Five
By the end of the month, I’d moved from my tiny apartment near Harvard to live with Melinda Potts. I was given the entire second floor with my own room and big bathroom and the adjoining nursery. Across the hall was Anna’s room, which has been left unchanged since she moved in with me closer to the university. Melinda had paint and wallpaper swatches on hand for the redecorating and renovations of the nursery, and once I settled into my space, we both started figuring out how we want it to look.
“I don’t think we should do anything until we know if it’s a girl or a boy,” she offered.
I agreed. “Four more weeks and we can tell the sex.”
We tentatively agreed that if it was a girl, the room will be lavender, and if a boy a darker shade of blue will be sufficient. We also agreed that teddy bears would work for either as a theme. I snickered and suggested we need a few camels too, or at the very least a desert theme somewhere just to remind us of his daddy, Amir.
“You know, when Anna ran off with Omar, Richard was so angry. I think it was partly the Arab thing, but also the big blowout he had with Omar. It took us both a while to settle on who our son-in-law was—and, of course, Anna living so far away.”
I agreed, “I never dreamt I’d find an Arab man attractive, let alone fall in love with one.”
Melinda put her hand on my arm. “If you love him, darling, why are you here? Finding that kind of love is more important than anything else I could ever imagine.”