I laugh at his absurd comment.
And then I cry at his generosity.
Chapter 39
Thayer
“Hey, hey!”
I hit save on my paper and spin in my desk seat to find one of my friends standing in the doorway of my dorm room.
“Are you kidding me right now? It’s Friday night,” Noah says. “Don’t make me unplug that thing.”
“I dare you,” I say, teasing though not really. He struts across my dorm room giving me a half-handshake, half-high five and then takes a seat on the edge of my bed. A few more pages and the paper’s done, but he has a point. It’s Friday night and it’s been a hell of a week.
“Bunch of us are going to Carter’s place for drinks. You in?”
I rest my hands behind my head, leaning back in my chair. “Yeah. Sure. Why not.”
I’ve been back in New Haven for a month now and this marks the first time I’ve actually gone out of my way to socialize. Ashlan’s begged me to hang out a few times, but so far I’ve been able to excuse my way out of those.
I grab my jacket, phone, wallet, and keys and follow Noah to the hall, locking up behind me.
Friday night on campus is alive and buzzing, everyone’s laughing, their good moods spreading like wildfire. A group of girls that I recognize from my philosophy class pass me going the opposite way and the blonde in the middle smiles and waves.
A year ago, something like that would’ve made my night. Now? It only makes me miss Lila.
Chapter 40
Lila
“Do either of you have any idea what you’ve done?” Howard’s eyes are wild and spittle leaves his lips when he talks. “Do you know what this means? No, you don’t. How could you?” He’s pacing back and forth in his study as Westley and I sit in the leather guest chairs, holding hands for show. “I told you, Westley!”
He points a crooked finger at his grandson.
“I told you to stay away from her!” He’s yelling now, his face cherry-red.
“This is going to destroy everything I’ve worked so hard to build for us,” he says. “Our family name. Our legacy. And the two of you have ruined it.” He rests his palm over his wrinkled forehead. “You can’t keep this baby. No one can know about this. No one.”
The thought of handing Thayer’s baby off to a perfect stranger to raise is one that never crossed my mind. The baby is mine. Ours. No matter how hard it’s going to be, I’m not giving it up.
“You know, I had my suspicions over the summer,” Howard said. “Went for a walk one morning and noticed the front door to the cottage was open. Went inside and no one was there, but why else would it have been open? Someone had to have been in there. I knew it was one of you boys, I just couldn’t figure out who …” he’s rambling, mostly talking to himself I think. “And you.” He points at me, his eyes even wilder than before. “I never should’ve given you a job here. You’re just like your harlot of a mother.”
“Granddad.” Westley stands up.
“Sit. Down. Westley,” he bites back before straightening his shoulders and resting his hands on his hips. He’s facing us square on, his gaze traveling between us. “There’s something the two of you need to know now that you’ve brought this plague upon our family.”
Westley squeezes my hand.
“The two of you are half-siblings,” Bertram says.
Westley and I exchange looks, and for a second I think I misheard Howard.
“H… how?” Westley asks.
My stomach churns and my entire body is clenched as I wait for his answer.
“Lila’s father is your father,” Howard says. “While your mother was pregnant with you and your sister, your father was sneaking around with Mary on the side.”
I hate the sound of my mother’s name in Bertram’s voice. It doesn’t belong there. He’s a vile human being and she was a saint.
“So my father is Ari?” I ask.
Howard clucks his tongue. “Unfortunately, yes.”
Westley and I release our hands from one another’s grasp. He’s my half-brother. We can’t pretend to be lovers anymore.
“I banished your mother from ever setting foot on this island again once I found out,” he says. “And I forgave Ed and Junie. Told them their positions here were safe as long as they agreed never to let Mary or the baby anywhere near Ari and Lorelai. My daughter was in love. She was starting her family, her life. I refused to have all of that ruined over some meaningless copulation.”
Oh my god.
It makes sense now …
The reason my mother refused to set foot in Maine.
The reason she kept herself so closely guarded.
Howard banished her.
And Ari broke her heart.
My mind goes to Ari next. The number of times the two of us interacted over the summer I could probably count on one hand. He was always standoffish and avoidant, and I assumed that was just his personality.