Dear God, I was going to have to come clean. Greg was a doctor, which meant he had a legal obligation to report suspected abuse. I hated having to tell him though, because Clay was so private, and it was extremely likely Greg was going to figure out who I was talking about. I didn’t care who knew I was into the lifestyle, but I didn’t want to ‘out’ Clay to one of our neighbors.
My face heated, but I lifted my chin and tried to look confident. “It was consensual.”
“Consensual,” he repeated.
“Yes.”
“I see.” His concern didn’t fade. “You sure? No one’s making you do anything you don’t want to, right?”
I gave a tight smile. “I’m sure. Trust me, I like what we do.”
He slowly relaxed a degree. “Okay.” He’d probably seen a lot of shit during his residency, so there wasn’t judgement in his eyes. Just the conditioned doctor response. “We don’t know each other that well, but if you ever need someone to talk to, or start to feel unsafe with your partner . . . you can come to me. I’m here.”
My chest was tight with awkwardness, but with warmth too. He was a good guy, and I was glad Cassidy was with him. Despite their age difference, and the messed-up situation with Preston, they made a great pair.
“Thanks, Greg.”
He nodded, reached for the door handle, but didn’t open it. “I hope he’s taking good care of you, during and after.”
Maybe I’d sat in the afternoon sun too long, because for the second time today, I spoke without thinking. “Don’t worry, they are. One of them is a doctor.”
TWENTY
After I’d changed out of my swimsuit, I went back outside and took a seat at the patio table beside Cassidy. Like me, she was drinking water in preparation for the main event tonight.
“You know,” she said, “there’s plenty of room on the party bus if you want to invite a friend.” She pulled at the strands of her hair to tighten her dark ponytail. “Like, say—Dr. Eckhart.”
Two girls in the pool squealed with laughter as Colin did a backflip off the diving board and splashed them with water. Nearly everyone here was paired up, or at least they all knew each other. There were inside jokes and conversations about past high school friends I didn’t know, and while I was probably Cassidy’s closest friend now, it was hard not to feel like an outsider.
She had Greg, and I didn’t want to cling to her all night. I was outgoing, but I felt like Clay when I thought about the upcoming evening. Being around unfamiliar people was exhausting.
“Even if Travis is willing,” I said, “I don’t know how Clay would feel about that.” His comment about being jealous ran through my mind.
She said it like I was being silly. “You could ask him.”
I opened my mouth to explain it wasn’t that simple, and promptly shut it. She made an excellent point, and we needed to be better about communication. I picked up my phone and thumbed out a text.
Me: I’m going out for my friend’s birthday tonight and I don’t know most of the people going. Would you mind if I asked Travis to come so I’m not the odd one out?
I sent the message and tried not to hold my breath. Clay and I didn’t date, but we hadn’t talked about it with Travis. Clay had said he didn’t want to stand in the way, and it seemed strange that he would be okay sharing me with another man, but not letting me hang out with one.
The three dots blinked on my screen, and then vanished.
My heart sank. He was struggling with how to respond. Had I just complicated things between us even more?
A new text message popped up on my screen. It was a group message with Clay and a number I didn’t recognize.
Clay: I’m looping Travis in on this, hope that’s okay. Lilith has something she wants to ask you.
I sat straighter in my chair, surprised and excited enough that Cassidy shot me a look.
“Everything okay?”
“Yeah,” I said. If Clay had an issue with me going out with Travis, I doubted the first thing he would have done was give me Travis’s number.
Me: Hey, Travis. It’s last minute, but are you free tonight? I’m going out for my friend’s birthday, but I don’t know most of the people going. Do you want to join me?
I didn’t have to wait long for his response.
Travis: Hi. Sure, but I’m still at work. What time?
Me: The party bus is picking us up at 8. My friend’s house is just down the street from Clay’s.
Travis: Party bus?
Me: It’s my friend’s 21st birthday. Her boyfriend rented a bus so we can go bar hopping. So...everyone will be kinda young.
Clay: OMG. It’s not too late to back out, Travis.