I fold my hands in my lap and smile at their dreams. From a distance, my eleven stepbrothers come across as brash jocks. The kind of men who would shout out of the window at a woman on the street. And maybe they have a little of that about them, but it’s not everything that they are. Getting to know them all is like peeling an onion. There’s layer upon layer, and each layer draws me closer rather than pushing me away.
“I’m not sure I believe in a higher power,” I say. “Life’s too hard. There’s too much tragedy and loss.”
Donovan reaches out and takes my hand. “If we didn’t know hardship, we would never truly appreciate joy,” he says. “The journey doesn’t have to be smooth to teach us the lessons we need to learn.”
“You think it’s about lessons?” I ask.
“Sure. We’re not put on this planet to sit in front of the TV eating fast food. We’re here to explore, to strive, to love. We’re here to go further than our parents, and to help our kids go further still.”
“My parents haven’t gone far,” I say.
“Maybe not, but your dad was absolutely focused on helping us all take a step up. He wanted us to fly. He wanted the same for you too.”
I stare out of the window, my heart suddenly clutched in a vice-like grip. How do these boys know what my dad wanted for me? When they talk this way, I can’t tell if they’re just being kind or if my father genuinely included me in all of his talks about hopes and dreams. Was I always present in their life, even in my absence? Would that make it better or worse to not be forgotten but to be excluded anyway?
We pull up outside Walter’s store, and it’s already buzzing with people. I’m not sure if it’s always decked out with red, white, and blue bunting and balloons, or if someone has just gone to town for today. Either way, it looks great. As we all jump out of the truck, Walter catches sight of us and drops the folder he was looking at on the table set out front.
“The troops have arrived,” he says gratefully, coming around to slap each of the triplets on the shoulders and then pull me into a big hug. “Thanks for coming.”
He steps back, still gripping me by the shoulders. “I still can’t get over how much you look like your mom. It’s like going back in time. How has your stay been so far? Have these boys been treating you well?”
I smile, glancing at them, finding their dark eyes filled with interest and amusement. I guess they’re thinking about the bed I slept in last night and the things they heard. I was treated very well by Harley and Hunter, but that’s not the kind of treatment that Walter is referring to.
“They’ve been amazing,” I say. “Really supportive.”
Dwayne makes a snorting sound, but my uncle doesn’t notice. “You’re really glowing,” Walter says, touching my cheek.
“I think it’s sweat,” I say self-consciously. “It’s really hot out.”
“It is. It’s going to be a great day. So, can I show you what I need you to do?”
“Sure.” I follow Uncle Walter into the store, and the triplets trail behind us.
“We’ve put together these packs. You can hand them out, encourage people to leave their email addresses and telephone numbers so we can get in touch with them. We’ve set up a competition to encourage this… they enter via this sign-up form.” Walter holds out a tablet.
“Wow, you’re getting with the technology, Walt,” Donovan says.
“Jolene helped me.” Walter shakes his head. “I’m getting too old for taking on all this new information.”
“Is she not here today?” I ask, gazing around for someone who could be my cousin all grown up.
“No, she’s competing. Your aunt has driven her.”
“That’s a shame. I want to catch up with her. I managed to get across to see Danna already.”
Walter’s bushy eyebrows shoot up. “You went to the Jackson ranch?”
“Yeah.” I shrug. “It was great.”
Walter glances at the boys and I get the feeling that he wants to ask me a whole load of questions about my visit but doesn’t want to with an audience.
“Shall we get to work then?” We all nod, and Walter shows us around and explains about his aims for the day. The store gradually starts to get busier and for three hours I’m rushed off my feet. Every time I pass one of the triplets, they wink at me or smile at me and my heart flutters. They’re such gorgeous men, with broad grins that light up their eyes and exude warmth. I’m even starting to see slight differences between them, like how Dwayne can raise his left eyebrow in a way that neither of his brothers can, or how Daryl’s smile is always a little lopsided. Then there’s the dimple that appears on Donovan’s right cheek when he’s being extra cheeky.