So violent I felt as if my chest had been impaled.
Around me, the party grew rowdy. The shots that had gone up to toast Carolina George were clearly hitting bloodstreams, the alcohol now flowing freely. The music had been turned back up, and a clamor of voices and laughter lifted above it to be heard.
I could physically feel the mood sliding into revelry.
And there I stood in the middle of it, caught in his wake. Feeling like I was being taken under. Lured into waters I couldn’t tread.
Deep, dark, and dangerous.
I swore, the man was a glittering, shiny stone at the bottom of the sea that I would drown trying to recover.
I wondered if I’d have sensed it so intensely if I hadn’t already been watching. If there’d been a single chance in the world that I could tear my eyes from the gorgeous man as he’d toasted with his band.
For a moment, I’d witnessed it—the true joy that had set so deeply in those blue eyes as he’d looked at his bandmates, at the people I knew were closest to him. That was until he’d looked at something on his phone, and he’d been stricken by panic.
My stomach twisted in a knot of worry, and I shivered with the prickles of unease that crept across my flesh.
I should look away.
Mind my own business.
But I wasn’t quite sure how to turn a blind eye on his suffering.
That’s what that man did to me, though, wasn’t it?
Confused me.
Conflicted me.
Made me want things I knew I certainly shouldn’t want.
Things I knew full well were going to hurt in the end.
Off to my left, a riot of laughter broke out in the kitchen. I was close enough to hear but far enough away not to be caught in the middle of it.
Ash Evans gave a lighthearted shove to Richard’s shoulder and then stumbled back, smacking his hands together. “It’s on. A thousand bucks, baby.” The gesture he made at himself was playfully arrogant. “Prepare to be schooled, oh young one.”
Ash hopped onto the middle of the island. Shoes and all.
Ash’s wife, Willow, groaned as she pressed the heel of her hand to her forehead. “Don’t you think you’re gettin’ too old for this?”
He sent her a waggish grin. “Too old? Come now, Peaches. This boy right here is in his prime.”
“Just don’t break a hip.” This from Zee, Sunder’s drummer, the guy nursing a beer where he was leaned up against the opposite counter.
Richard hopped up beside Ash, all smiles and cockiness. “I’ll try not to show you up too badly, old man. Don’t want you to have to suffer the embarrassment.”
Lyrik stepped to the bar, pulled out his wallet, and made a big show of slapping a bill onto the granite. “Got a Benjamin this newbie can’t make a fool outta my boy.”
Leif came up beside him and tossed two bills onto the pile. “I’ll see you and double it.”
Music thrummed, the lights dim, everyone’s faces full of their smiles and laughter. Some moved in to pay attention to the commotion in the kitchen while others paid no mind, clearly accustomed to the antics.
Lyrik took out a wad of cash, tattooed fingers fanning it out. “Easy money, baby. Bring it.”
Lyrik’s wife, Tamar, grinned behind her champagne flute. She was all leather and sex and red-slicked lips. Covered in ink. She looked like a modern-day pin-up. Gorgeous to the extreme.
“The balls on these boys,” she teased above the mayhem, angling up to slip her arm around her husband’s waist from behind. “Someone run and get the measuring stick…I feel what’s coming next.”
Lyrik shifted to drape an arm around her shoulders, dropping a kiss to the top of her head. “Now why would I go and embarrass my friends like that? No competition, Baby Blue.”
Her smirk was even bigger than his when she tipped her face up to look at him. “Maybe I just need a little reminder.”
“Ahh…there’s my Red. I do think that can be arranged.”
“All right…time to prove it,” Baz said. “You two ready?”
“Yup. Let’s do this.”
“Hells yeah!”
“Go,” Baz shouted, and Richard and Ash flipped into handstands. Everyone cheered and started throwing in their own bets.
They were having a blast.
Me?
I couldn’t settle into it.
Into the festivity.
I felt like an outsider. Like I was floating around the perimeter witnessing it all through a fuzzy pane of glass.
My conscience wouldn’t allow me to look away, to pretend like everything was just fine, when things clearly weren’t for Rhys.
A buzz of nerves rippling through my body, I slipped through the fray and wound toward the back doors.
Feeling like I was on a covert mission.
A forbidden endeavor.
I was almost there when someone grabbed my hand.
Suppressing a yelp, I whirled around to find my brother staring back. I heaved out a breath of relief. “Royce.”
He gave my hand a gentle squeeze. “Hey…you good, Mag Pie?”