Her eyes gaze up at me, like she’s trying to figure me out. I kiss her, letting her know I’m all hers.
My hand runs through her hair as I keep pushing deeper. Every part of my body comes alive at her soft touch and I try not to end this thing so soon. I want to make it last. “I’m going to fuck you fast and hard, and then I’ll keep loving you all night long.”
Monterey nods her approval and I pick up my pace, my heart beat hammering out of control. I’ve wanted this woman for the longest time, and having my cock sinking into her is one of the best feelings I’ve ever felt. How could it be this good?
My mind wanders as I keep pushing, keep screwing, and I picture a fulfilled life with this woman. A brilliant career as a driver.
I picture it all with Monterey by my side.
“I’m so close,” she whispers, and my veins boil with pride that I’m the one who makes her feel this way.
“I want to feel you.” I gaze into her eyes as I keep rocking into her. “Come all over me.”
And then she loses control and I’m there to hold onto her. To let her know I’ll follow wherever she goes.
Because for the first time I’m falling too.
And I don’t know if anyone will be there to catch me.
Chapter 30
Monterey
As I lay in bed, lying next to Danger, my heart can’t contain all of this emotion swimming freely. The way he holds me after having sex. After fucking me senseless says it all.
Does he hold all the other women this way?
I have to believe he doesn’t. I have to believe no other woman has ever seen this softer side of him.
I touch his cheek, feeling the stubble underneath my fingertips. “Dylan,” I say, trying on the name to see how it fits.
“Mmm.”
“Tell me something nobody else in the world knows about you.”
He laughs softly. “I don’t like green beans.”
I shove him in the side of his ribs. “No, something real.”
He kisses the top of my head as we snuggle in closer on the bed. “Sometimes I get scared when I’m out there on the racetrack.”
I prop myself up on an elbow. “Seriously?”
He shrugs, his dark eyes meeting mine. “I almost feel like I want to get so close to death, just to see what it’s like. If it’ll capture me or spit me back out.”
“What do you mean?”
“Have you ever wondered if your life has any meaning? Like if you weren’t supposed to die a long time ago. It’s hard to explain.”
I don’t say anything, but just lean back down, resting my head on his chest.
He continues, “Sometimes I wonder if I even deserve to live.”
“Oh, Dylan, how can you even think that?”
He holds me tighter, like the mere thoughts he’s having are too big for him to contain alone. “I let people down. I should have done better. My whole life I’ve never done anything I could be proud of.”
Now it’s time for me to hold him. “I’m sure that’s not true.”
“It’s true.”
“You punched Thad in the face. You should be proud of that.”
He laughs and kisses the top of my forehead once more. “I like this.”
“Like what?”
“This. Laying here with you. Laughing.”
I press my lips against his ribcage. “I like this too.”
We’re silent for a while, and Danger’s breathing has evened out. I wish I knew something about his life. A bad upbringing doesn’t label a person. It’s the way a person overcomes after a speed bump that defines them. And Danger is a fighter. No one can convince me otherwise.
He said he had let people down in the past. Has he ever had someone fight for him?
The next few days pass in a blurred frenzy of never ending activity. Danger wins the race easily, and already we’re driving to the next city.
Each tour brings new possibilities. And I remember a time when Thad and I would travel from race to race together. Most of the time I traveled with my father because Thad needed to focus.
And it was never like this. It was never this freeing between Thad and I like it is with Danger and me.
Danger makes me feel like an equal. Like I belong. I can see now Thad never made me feel that way. I’m glad now that Thad cheated on me. I can’t even imagine what my life would be like if I went through with that relationship.
I gaze at Danger while he drives. It’s becoming one of my most favorite things to do. The way the sunlight plays off his dark hair. I study his profile. His strong jawline. The barely there stubble that grows if he goes a few days without shaving.
Most times he doesn’t even realize I’m watching him. And I like watching him when he’s lost in thought. When he’s focused on the road and tugging at his eyebrow with his left hand.