The twins think for a moment.
“So you weren’t doing this in Lake Puckett?” Brandon’s tone is bit cruel, and I shudder a bit.
“No!” I practically scream. “This service doesn’t even exist in Wyoming as far as I know! I only did it for that one summer in New York.”
I look from brother to brother, desperate for them to believe me. But then a calm descends on my soul, and my shoulders relax ever so slightly because I know I can’t control what they think or do. I can only be myself, and what they choose to believe is on them.
“I have to go,” I say suddenly. “I’m sorry, but this has dragged on long enough. It’s time for me to leave.”
Now, it’s the Cartwrights’ turn to look stunned.
“What? We’re still talking,” growls Brandon.
But I merely shrug and drop the towel, turning my back on them. I start getting dressed, ignoring the two huge forms in the bathroom.
“It’s time for me to make my way back to Lake Puckett. I’m sorry this happened, and I’m sorry I ever put you through this. But I want you to know that it wasn’t intentional. It will take time for these words to sink in, but I never meant to hurt you.”
With that, I pull on my top and button my jeans. I make to leave the bathroom, except the two huge men are standing in my way. I try to duck around one, but he steps into my path.
“I need to go,” I say in a chilly tone. “Please let me pass.”
“No, Bessie,” says Ben in a low voice. “We’re not done yet.”
I look at up him, my eyes searching.
“You know everything now, okay? You know my deepest, darkest secret now, and evidently, it’s not something you can live with. So it’s time for me to leave.”
But Brandon places a large hand on my forearm, and I go still.
“You were just a child, Bessie. And you made it out alive.”
I take a deep breath, tears suddenly springing to my eyes.
“We all know that hindsight is twenty-twenty,” I say, hating the waver in my voice. “Now I know that I could have talked to my parents, or tried to work something out with the landlord, or even stayed in the shelter for a bit longer. But I didn’t understand that at nineteen. I didn’t have the maturity, and just jumped at what seemed like the best option.”
I stop for a moment, my voice choked and merely stand there.
“But here’s the thing, and it’s going to be the last that I’ll say on this matter.”
Two pairs of glowing blue eyes meet mine.
“And what is that?” Ben asks in an even tone. I take a deep breath and look into their gazes.
“I’m proud of myself. I took care of myself when I was in New York, even if I didn’t know how. I didn’t have anyone I could rely on, and I turned to the resources I had. I was pushed into a tight spot, but I got myself out in the end.”
Brandon stands up straighter, sharing a glance with his twin. Meanwhile, I continue.
“You may not like what you’re hearing, but that’s the truth. It’s a chapter of my life that I don’t ever want to relive, but I’m not ashamed of what I did. I’m not ashamed that I took care of me because that’s what real women do.”
The twins are still, their massive forms taking most of the space in the small bathroom.
“I know, sweetheart,” Brandon says slowly. “This has been very illuminating.”
I snort.
“Hopefully.”
Ben sighs too, taking my hand in his large fist.
“Don’t take this as pity,” he begins, “because I know you don’t like to be pitied. But it sounds like you were in between a rock and hard place when it came to figuring out your life. Options were limited, and you made do.”
I nod slowly, agreeing to this assessment of my situation. “Again, my options felt really limited, even if they weren’t entirely.”
Ben speaks. “So you did what you had to, and that unfortunate chapter in your life passed.”
“Yes,” I say, my heart beginning to race. Are these men hearing me? Really hearing me, the way that I need? It seems so because Brandon takes my other hand in his own.
“We get it,” he says. “It’s okay. The story we got from the Sarge was obviously jumbled and incomplete. He thought you were an active lady of the night, but clearly that’s in your past.”
I nod my head vehemently.
“Yes. It’s done.”
Both men squeeze my hands then, and my pulse begins to race in my ears. Is this really happening? Have Ben and Brandon forgiven me?
But then I remind myself that I don’t need to be forgiven. What I did, I did because of necessity. And I never lied to them. Yes, I didn’t reveal every aspect about my summer in New York, but I was waiting for the right time because you can’t just drop something like that without warning. It needs to be at the right time, the right place, and with the right approach.