Before he could reply, a woman with a tray of some kind of raw meat walked over to us. “Would you like one?” she asked.
“Sure, after you cook it,” I replied.
Jason laughed, but it wasn’t his amused laughter. It was his annoyed laugh. He said no thank you to the person before turning back to me. “You’re so extreme, Aaliyah.”
He wasn’t wrong. At times, I could be dramatic. “Other than the lack of food, everything else is pretty great, yeah? The event turned out well. I’m so proud of you.”
Jason smiled. “Yeah, if only you’d actually talk to some people other than me.”
“I’ve talked to your parents all night long!”
“I think we both know that doesn’t count as putting yourself out there. Aaliyah…you have to talk to people.” Jason sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. He was tired. How could he not be? Lately, Jason’s default mode was tired. He’d been working nonstop for the past few months trying to get the real estate company running in Los Angeles. He was beyond stressed, and I wasn’t certain I’d fully understand the answer if I asked him what all his job entailed. All I knew was that he was always busy. Therefore, that meant early mornings and late nights. Early-bird flights and redeyes. Intensely brewed coffee and painfully strong whiskey.
I worried about him sometimes. I worried about the burnout all great businessmen experienced. Still, he always told me he was fine, even on the days it was clear he wasn’t.
Fun, free-spirited Jason hardly came out to play lately, and I was somewhat kicking myself for not latching on tighter when I felt it slipping away. When we had first started dating, he’d been so energized and full of life. Yet after we moved in together, it felt as if I was living with a stranger. He was short with me a lot but then he would apologize, saying it was due to his workload.
“You know how I feel about socializing,” I explained, fiddling with my fingers.
He nodded. “Yes, only with your friends.”
“Exactly. Ross, Rachel, Phoebe…”
“Aaliyah.” Jason stated my name as if I were a misbehaving child, and I nodded, knowing from the slight undertone in his voice that he was feeling pressure. “A lot of people who are important to me are here tonight, and I think it’s important for them to interact with the most important person in my life.”
“Okay, okay. I need ten minutes of fresh air. Then I’ll come back and be the perfect bride-to-be.”
“Sounds good.”
“Before I go, can you make me a promise?”
“Anything.”
“After we’re done here tonight, can we go get some real food? Maybe a place with a bread basket?”
He laughed his real laugh, and that made me happy. “Oh, Liyah.” His mouth grazed over mine before he moved his lips to my forehead, where he planted a kiss. His voice was low, full of a sweetness that didn’t exactly match the words he spoke. “You know you shouldn’t be eating carbohydrates.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” I asked, stunned by his comment.
“God, don’t do that,” he groaned.
“Don’t do what?”
“Get all emotional.”
“What are you talking about? You said that weird thing about me eating and—”
“Not now, Aaliyah,” he whispered with sternness to his tone. “I’m not going to have one of our pointless arguments at my event. This is supposed to be a happy occasion. Don’t ruin it with your emotions.”
“I’m just saying…that was a rude comment.”
“Rude or honest? I mentioned the other day that your ass looked fat in your dress.”
I frowned, feeling extremely self-conscious. I thought that was a compliment.
The smell of liquor fell from every exhalation he had. I loved Jason, but I didn’t like the man he was when he drank. Some nights I wondered if I even knew who he had really been. I wondered if the alcohol made him speak his truths, or transition into someone who only spoke lies. I stared at him as if he were a complete stranger. I’d been noticing his belittling behavior more and more the past few weeks.
Over the past six weeks, I crawled into bed with a stranger. We’d been together for over a year, yet it was only six weeks ago that we moved in with one another. Our love story began with rainbows and butterflies. I was obsessed with Jason Rollsfield, and he was obsessed with me. That was until I gave up my apartment and moved in with him. After the move, it was as if my Prince Charming had turned into the Beast.
Everything I did annoyed him. Every time he belittled me, he’d flip it around and say I’d somehow taken his words out of context. He didn’t hug me as often; he didn’t caress me as he had before. Each day that passed, I felt more of a disconnect and it worried me to my core.