“Always?”
“Yeah, like fifty percent of the time.”
“That’s not always.”
“Oh, then not always, I guess.”
“What were you even doing out here?” I asked, soaking wet, dazed, and confused.
Kennedy looked back at me, and her lips curved up into a crooked smile.
Who knew crooked smiles could look…cute?
Whatever. It wasn’t that I was noticing that Kennedy’s smile was cute. Because it wasn’t. I mean, it was, but I wasn’t noticing it because I didn’t notice those kinds of things about Kennedy Lost.
She raised her eyebrow. “Oh, I was shooting archery.”
“In the pouring rain?”
She nodded. “Yes. It makes you a better shooter if you work against the elements of nature. The rain adds an obstacle that forces me to think outside the box and do something different.” She pulled out her bow and held it out toward me. “Do you want to try?”
I shook my head. “No. I want to go get dry.”
“Okay. I can walk you to your bunk and you can grab some of your clothes. Then you can sleep in my bed with me so the guys don’t bother you.”
“I don’t need some girl watching after me,” I spat out, feeling embarrassed.
“Yes, you do,” she replied, not in a mean way, just as a fact. “Now come on, I’ll keep my arrows pointed at them as you get your stuff.”
Even though I wanted to argue with her, I knew better than to fight with an unstable girl holding a bow and arrow.
We went to my cabin, and I gathered some clothes for the night as Kennedy protected me from the guys.
They didn’t say a word.
When I got to her cabin, her roommates were already sleeping. Thank God. The last thing I needed was for people to think I was in love with a girl like Kennedy Lost.
I changed in the bathroom, and Kennedy changed after me—putting on yet another brightly colored pajama set. Only Kennedy would have neon green pajamas.
She crawled into her bed, and I reluctantly crawled in beside her. The last time I’d been in bed with a girl was—oh, that’s right.
Never.
I’d never been in bed with a girl.
She turned to face me and gave me that stupid cute crooked smile that made my stomach sick. “Why didn’t you dance in the rain out there, Jax?”
“I don’t dance in the rain.”
“Then when do you dance?”
“Never.”
She frowned, and holy crap, that was cute, too. She flipped over and turned her back to me. “You should dance in the rain. It will make you happy.”
“I am happy.”
“You’ll be even happier if you dance in the rain.”
I didn’t know what to say to that, so I said nothing.
“You don’t talk a lot, do you?” she asked.
“No.”
“That’s okay. I talk a lot. I go on and on and on and on and”—she took a deep breath—“on with words even though they don’t really lead me anywhere.”
I couldn’t disagree with that.
I shifted around on her bed that I wasn’t supposed to be in. “I have to be out of here before anyone wakes up. People can’t see us in the same bed.”
She yawned. “Don’t worry, I always wake up before everyone to go talk to the birds that sing to me in the morning.”
I yawned because she yawned, and now we were yawning together. “You’re a very weird girl, Kennedy.”
In my head, I could see her cute crooked smile that made me sick as she replied, “Thank you, Jax.”
9
Kennedy
Present day
It rained for three days straight, and I was exhausted.
I hated storms. I was never able to sleep through them, and when I was alone, I couldn’t shut off my brain. My anxiety was through the roof. I missed Penn. Well, not him as much as having someone lying beside me in bed during the storms. The comfort of having another warm human beside me when I was in the midst of my lowest points always made them seem that much easier.
Now I was dealing with my anxiety alone, and there was no secret that it was getting to me. I wasn’t sure what was more exhausted, my body or my mind.
I tried to do as much as I could to keep busy. I made lists of things I wanted to do to be brave. I tried my best to meditate. I cried sometimes, too, because Yoana said crying was brave.
Then I waited for the storm to pass, and thankfully, I knew that no matter how big the storm, they’d always pass no matter what. After every storm, the sun would shine again.
It took a few days for the sun to come out, and when it did, the landscaping team showed up. Even though I was extremely fatigued, I was ready to see what they had planned to whip the yard into shape. It was a beautiful space, and I could only imagine that Yoana had her own outline and plans already forming in her mind for what she wanted her yard to look like. I couldn’t wait to see the landscapers make it come to life.