“Do you think she’s happy when she’s with us?”
“Yep. She laughs at your house.”
“Is that because my street is clean?”
I side-eyed the wall at that.
“Because your street makes me sad,” he continued. “But your house is pretty.”
I smiled.
“I like it here a lot more. If they got married, could we live here instead?”
“You could have my bedroom. It’s bigger than the other one.”
As much as I hated it, I had to put a stop to this conversation.
I got up and knocked lightly on his room. “Hey…Can we talk?”
“Uh-oh,” Zac said, sadness tinging his tone. “Did you hear us?”
I nodded, stuffing my hands into the pockets of my sweatpants.
“Oh,” Lola replied. “Are you angry?”
“Angry? You think I’m angry?”
Two little heads bobbed the affirmative at me.
“Oh, god, no.” I went and crouched in front of them both on the bed. “Don’t be silly. I’m not angry at all. I just wanted to talk about it with you.”
“Are you going to marry my mommy?” Lola pushed hair from her face.
I tucked that same hair behind her ear. “I can’t answer that, sweetheart. I don’t know. I love your mom—”
“I think she loves you, too.”
“She smiles a lot with you,” Zac added.
I touched his hand. “But it’s not always that simple. I know it’s hard for you guys to understand, but there are lots of things about being an adult you’ll get one day.”
Lola looked down at her hands. “But that’s not fair,” she said in a tiny, but very wobbly, voice. “I want you to get married. I think you’d be the best daddy.”
Fighting the tears was becoming damn near impossible. The weakness in her voice broke my fucking heart.
“Lola.” Lightly, I touched her chin, and she looked at me. Unshed tears glistened in her dark eyes—tears that gripped old of my gut and twisted it. “Things don’t happen just because you want them to. I wish they did.”
“Don’t you want to be my daddy?”
Zac sniffed. I glanced at him—he was almost crying, too.
“I would love to be your daddy,” I answered honestly. “And I would love for your mommy to be Zac’s mommy. If we could get away with making that choice just us three, that would be fun, huh?”
They both nodded.
“But we can’t do that. There’s a lot happening right now. Your mom is at a job interview and has something important this afternoon. We won’t be working together soon, so I don’t even know if we’ll see each other anymore.”
Horror exploded onto both of their faces.
“No!” Lola’s tears escaped her eyes. “I don’t want that. That’s not fair.”
I agreed.
“It’s not. And I’m gonna do everything I can to make sure that doesn’t happen, okay?” I stood and pulled the little girl onto my lap. She snuggled into my chest, sniffling and trembling. I motioned for Zac to come over, and he curled into my side. “I promise you guys that I’m gonna try really hard, okay?”
“I want my mom to love you,” Lola whispered.
“I want that, too,” Zac echoed.
I smiled, kissing the tops of both of their heads. “Me, too, kids. Me, too.”
It wasn’t a lie.
I did.
I wanted Perrie Fox to love me back, even if it wasn’t a good idea.
I hugged them for several more minutes until Lola fidgeted. “Are you guys all good now? Want some food?”
“Yeah.” Zac escaped from my clutches. “Got any candy? We’re sad and need candy.”
I set Lola on the bed to her silent agreement. “I think I can find some. You sure you’re fine?”
They both nodded, and I glanced at them to confirm, then headed out of the room.
Then, I stopped the other side of the door and got exactly what I was hoping for.
“I have an idea,” Zac said, whispering conspiratorially.
“What?” Lola stage-whispered in return.
“We have to make them fall in love. Like the fat baby with the arrows.”
The fat baby with the arrows. My god.
“Yes!” Springs squeaked as Lola moved. “How do we do that?
“Let’s come up with a plan.”
Trying to hold in my laughter at my son’s description of Cupid, I left them to it.
Maybe I should have told them that you can’t make people fall in love, but damned if I didn’t wanna see them give it a good fucking shot.
Chapter Twenty
Perrie
Abby nodded and scribbled on the bottom of her sheet. “All right, then. We’re all done. You’ve picked up some great skills over the years and I’m impressed. Thank you.”
“Thank you.” I smiled, the butterflies going wild in my stomach.
She tucked her auburn hair behind her ear as she stood. “Dahlia’s waiting to chat with you, so I’ll go let her know we’re done.”
“Great. Thanks.”
Abby offered me a warm, beaming smile, grabbed her things, and went.
I blew out a long breath and relaxed back into the chair for the first time in forty-five minutes. While she was one of the nicest people I’d ever been interviewed by, that didn’t change how important this job was to me.