“Jesus fuck, Lil. What happened?” he shouted when he saw my other arm.
I instinctively tried to cover my bandaged arm and gave him a cautious look. “Um . . . Johnny stabbed me. He’s not there, Dare sent him away,” I added quickly when I saw a look of pure rage settle in Beck’s eyes.
“I’ll fucking kill that psycho.”
“Yeah, well you might need to get in line. He did it because he saw you drive off not long before I walked up to the house last night, and he’s been suspicious about me from the first night he met me,” I explained. “And I think he just wanted to pay me back.”
“For what?”
I lifted my arm.
Beck looked at me blankly for a few seconds, and then his face morphed into shock. “No shit, Lil. You stabbed Johnny?”
“He came after me when his paranoia was at an all-time high about a week and a half ago,” I said, and tried to ward off the chill from the memory. “But I keep one of Kieran’s knives in my bag . . .”
He fought back a grin before putting the car in drive and taking off. “I don’t know if I should smack you or high-five you or lock you up for the rest of your goddamn life. But, Jesus, I’m fucking proud of you.”
“Yeah, well—”
“That’s not something you’re gonna be able to hide from Kieran.”
My stomach clenched, and I sucked in a swift breath. I hadn’t even thought about Kieran seeing my arm, but now that Beck mentioned it, I wondered why it mattered.
He was going to find out everything anyway. One way or another.
“You’re wrong, you know,” I mumbled to Beck when we were nearly home. “About Dare.”
He huffed, the sound tired and frustrated. “Oh yeah?”
I turned my head where it was resting against the window to look at him. “We all know eventually they’re coming back for me, but they’re not doing it to get back at you for lying to them. They’re not biding their time to scare us with what they’re planning. They’re scared.”
From Beck’s furrowed brow, I knew he wasn’t sure what to do with what I was suggesting.
“He’s worried because they messed up by destroying the house. He’s waiting for the day that Holloway comes after them to prevent them from coming for me.” When Beck’s eyebrows shot up, I warned, “I’ll never forgive you if that’s what you do.”
“I’m not who you have to worry about. When Kieran finds out, he’s gonna go on a hunt.”
“Beck.” His name sounded strangled coming from me. “Beck, you can’t let him. Please don’t let him.”
“Lil, the guy wants to kill you. Who cares if Kieran stops—”
“Beck, please.”
“Lily,” he barked. “Do you realize how fucked this whole situation is? You fell into it with a Borello. The Borello. You turned your back on us and—”
“Don’t talk to me about turning backs. Don’t you dare.”
“You’ve been sleeping with a Borello. You’ve been hanging with Borellos. You got stabbed by a motherfucking Borello and acted like it was just something that happens. And look at you. For someone who gets so pissed about being kept hidden in the guesthouse, you’re hiding yourself.” He let out a sound of frustration and flung his hand out. “Take that shit off.”
I ground my teeth, but didn’t respond as I put the glasses away and took out the contacts, then threw my hair into a bun on top of my head.
“You’re going to the meeting with us this afternoon. You’re not leaving my sight after this. I don’t care what he said to you or how in love with him you think you are. They’re still coming for you, and I’m not leaving you unprotected for anything.”
Anger burned so deep, but I forced myself to breathe as I searched my bag for the makeup remover. I knew I couldn’t respond to him without lashing out.
Even with Dare’s need to keep his family protected, he’d still known he couldn’t keep me locked up. He’d heard me when I’d told him that if he’d tried, he would never see me again, and he’d respected it.
“Now you know why it feels like I’m dying every time you force me to watch you leave.”