I knew he was referring to the way I wouldn’t look at any of them, but I was afraid of what would happen when I opened my eyes. I was shaking and felt cold, as if someone had just shoved me in an icebox. I was also sweating as badly as the man with the leashes.
“Briar,” Lucas said in warning, but I knew the tone was more for the men than me.
With another steadying breath out, I forced my heavy lids open—but I was only able to take in the scene in front of me before everything went black.
Silence that felt impossibly loud sounded in my ears, and I felt very aware of everything and nothing all at once.
I knew I was standing. I knew I was trying to breathe calmly. I knew I was staring blankly at nothing, because I was seeing nothing. I knew I was leaning too far forward, and I needed to stop myself.
But I couldn’t see or hear anything other than that deafening silence, and I couldn’t discern the time that was passing, because this horror felt like an eternity.
I threw my hand out to my side, to where Lucas had been. The force of my movement caused me to stumble backward. Before I could attempt to right myself, everything came rushing back to me all at once, and I slammed into Lucas’s side as the light and the noise became too much.
Lucas caught me automatically, but I only had a moment to rest in his arms—my head falling heavily to his chest—before he was gripping my shoulder and shoving me away.
I could only imagine how I looked from the panic that flashed across his face before he was able to control it, and then his face was twisted with practiced anger.
“I need something to drink.”
Surprise and worry filled those dark, dark eyes before he forced it away, and sneered, “You can wait until I’m finished talking with these men. Don’t int—”
“No. Now,” I said sluggishly, and blindly reached for him again when I swayed in his direction. He batted my hand away, but his other hand on my shoulder tightened to keep me from falling.
“What is wrong with her?” a man asked. His tone showed how shocked he was with the way I was acting.
“I need water,” I said to Lucas as my shaking continued. “Something. Please.”
When he spoke, his voice was low, dangerous. “You can wait. Do not interrupt us again.”
The sweating man scoffed. “Am I right to assume all those rumors of your success have been just that?”
“Lucas, I’m—”
“Briar!” he snapped, shock and anger playing on that dangerous face as he forced me closer and dropped his head to whisper in my ear—but Lucas stilled when one of the men spoke.
“Is your mentor aware of your girl’s disobedience?”
It felt as though the entire hall had gone silent even though it was just the group surrounding us waiting for Lucas’s response.
My devil leaned away from me, a cruel smirk pulling at his mouth. “Her disobedience?” he asked in a dangerous tone. His eyes left mine and flashed toward the men. “Her disobedience is nothing a night of lessons won’t fix.”
The men laughed loudly, and Lucas used the moment to dip his head so his lips were at my ear again.
“Breathe, Blackbird,” he whispered in a calming tone. “Slow, deep breaths. Stand here and breathe. I can’t let you leave, and I can’t let you push me to stop the conversation. I promise I’ll take you somewhere so you can sit down soon. Just breathe.” He looked every inch of the Lucas Holt he needed to play when he pulled away from me, and he sent the men a frustrated look when he turned toward them again. But even though he released my arm, he was standing closer to me than he’d originally been, and I knew he was ready to catch me if I started to fall.
Which still felt like too real of a possibility.
“Ah. Jealous bitches,” the sweating man said again, then searched through his leashes until he found the one he was looking for. He held it up, shoulder-height, and one of the women sat back so she was sitting up on her knees instead of kneeling down on all fours. “This one did the same—my first. We were at this very event when she realized I would be buying my second. She started crawling all over me like a bitch in heat. I didn’t wait until we got home, I took her into the bathroom and taught her a lesson right then.”
A shuddering breath left me, and my eyes fluttered shut as the room once again spun—as my hatred and disgust for the man grew so strong that I wanted to scream and claw at his face, wanted to yank the leashes from his hand and use them against him.
Lucas made some sort of humming noise in the back of his throat, but I was struggling too hard to stay vertical to focus on it. “That’s not a bad idea,” he said, his tone filled with amusement. “After the show mine just gave you, I think I’m going to have to do the same.”
“Don’t let us stop you,” the other man said, and the sweating man laughed loudly, yanking on the leashes as he did.
Lucas said brief goodbyes, then turned and started walking away from me, and I struggled to follow.
It wasn’t until we were out of eyesight of that group that he slowed and grasped my arm, gentle enough not to hurt, but firm enough to help me stay standing—firm enough for anyone looking to think he was dragging me rather than helping me.