“I can look,” Lyric said, her eyes lighting up the way they did at any hint of a new research project. The look was so familiar and so Lyric that I laughed. She may have been made vampire, but she was still my nerdy best friend who I loved dearly.
“Denying a bond is painful but possible,” Avi said, and I flashed the princess a small grin. She’d been supportive since day one. No one agreed more than her that a mating bond needed to be a personal choice, not a supernatural one, when it came to accepting it or not.
“That first six months wasn’t as bad as it is now,” I admitted. Running from him had been hard, but I’d managed. “The pull between us wasn’t as…intense.”
“That’s because you both hadn’t acknowledged that a bond had occurred,” Avi explained, and we all raised our brows at her. She shrugged. “I’ve read a lot about them,” she said. “Anyway, both partners have to see the mark and acknowledge it before the pull starts. I think that is fate’s way of giving one a chance to think over the match. The attraction would be there naturally, but the actual can’t sleep, can’t eat, can’t think without feeling the other person wouldn’t occur until both knew about it.”
“So if I would’ve never shown Lachlan his mark on the back of my neck…”
“He would’ve hauled you back here anyway,” Lyric finished for me. “And he eventually would’ve seen the mark.”
“And he may have sensed something about you, but without seeing it…” Avi considered for a moment. “It’s like trying to flip on a light switch in a pitch-black room. They may feel that the light switch is there, but they wouldn’t be able to find it to turn it on without the other person showing them. Does that make sense?” Avi asked.
“No,” I said, laughing angrily. “None of this makes sense. But yes, at the same time, I understand what you’re saying.”
“Do you wish you hadn’t shown him?” Lyric asked softly.
I raked my fingers through my hair. “I don’t know,” I said. “I thought he was there to kill me. I thought the mark was the only thing that would spare my life and let me live long enough to save Daphne.”
Lyric sucked in a sharp breath.
“I know that isn’t true now,” I hurried to add. “But I’d been on the run for six months from a lot of people who wanted me dead. Technically, I’m still on the run. But the accommodations are much nicer,” I tried to joke, but I was too tangled up inside. “I can’t let what happened on the fourth happen again.” There might not be too many more chances to get Daphne out safely. They’ll either make her disappear or worse… “Is there any way to take the edge off the bond? A tonic? Pill?”
Lyric bit her lip. “Accepting it would tie you up for a few days, but after that, you’d be better able to manage it.”
I gave her a seriously look.
“What?” she asked innocently. “You asked.”
“Meditation?” Avi suggested, and I pinched the bridge of my nose.
“This is hopeless.”
“You could fuck him.”
All of our heads snapped to Olivia—the sweet but deadly and usually poised royal bodyguard who’d just dropped the F-bomb.
“Olivia!” Avi chided.
“What? You honestly haven’t thought of that as an option?” she asked me.
“Of course, I’ve thought about it. The damn bond makes me think about it all day long.”
“Okay, sure,” Olivia said. “But pretend the bond doesn’t exist.”
I arched a brow at her to say that was impossible.
“Just hear me out,” she said. “If the bond didn’t exist…on a purely physical level, would you want Lachlan?”
I opened and closed my mouth a few times. Who wouldn’t want him? He radiated strength, carried himself with respect, and had a dark sense of humor that called to my own. Not to mention his body was like beautifully carved stone, and just the brush of his skin against mine had lit my body up like a Christmas tree.
“I’m taking that as a yes,” Olivia said.
“Yes,” I echoed her. “If I’d seen him at a bar, I would’ve approached him.”
“Excellent,” Olivia said. “See? You can separate your own feelings from the bond if you try hard enough. And one way to give yourself some balance would be to get the need for him out of your system. Once that craving is satisfied, you should have a clearer head.” She glanced to Lyric. “Am I wrong?”
Lyric glanced at each of us before a laugh burst from her lips. “Oh, yes,” she said. “Once you’re satisfied, you’ll think much, much clearer.”
I tilted my head at Avi. “I can’t tell if she’s being sarcastic or not.”
Avi laughed. “I think it’s both?”
Olivia pushed off the mat. “Rematch?”
The rest of us stood, but I shook my head. My thoughts were a tangled mess at the possibilities. Olivia was right—separate from the bond, I wanted Lachlan. Due to the bond, I wanted him more than I’d ever wanted anyone in my life, so it was like a double-whammy. Of course, I hadn’t been able to think clearly. With the stress of Daphne’s situation coupled with the incessant demands of the mating bond, I couldn’t see straight if my life depended on it.