He turned to look at me. “Then I’ll fall utterly and completely in love with your wrinkles.”
“I’m being serious here,” I mock scolding.
“Close your eyes,” he whispered. “Imagine you are me. You are going to live forever, but the only thing you love in the world is going to be taken away from you in sixty-three years and there is not a thing you can do about it.”
My eyes popped open and I stared at him with pity.
He nodded. “Do you get it now?”
I nodded silently.
“I have enjoyed every precious second of our time together and I’m going to keep doing that.”
“Okay,” I whispered and wrapped my arms around him. At that moment I loved him, more than I had thought was possible. But I was wrong, because as the years went by, I loved him even more.
And my great love was never ending. It just kept on growing and growing.
Sixty-three years later
Rocco
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fCZVL_8D048
Jerusalema ikhaya lami(Jerusalem is my home)
Ngilondoloze(Guard me),
Uhambe nami(Walk with me)
Ndawo yami ayikho lana(My place is not here)
Mbuso wami awukho lana(My kingdom is not here)
I didn’t attend her funeral. It was held in the day, but our children and grandchildren did. Now that the sun has set I stand by her grave and lay flowers on the fresh dirt. She didn’t suffer. She wasn’t sick. She simply said, “My darling, it’s nearly time.”
We never slept that whole night. I didn’t want to miss her passing. At four in the morning she turned towards the door, and smiled. “You have come.”
I didn’t have to look towards the door to know there was no one there. She turned her gaze back to me.
“I have to go,” she whispered.
She saw the tears in my eyes, and she whispered. “I’ll wait for you.”
I nodded, I couldn’t speak. I held her hand tightly as if I could stop her slipping away. I couldn’t. She slipped away. I lay my head on her silent chest until it was morning. Then I made arrangements for her funeral.
Some small animal scurries in the dark behind me. No point standing here. She is not here under the dirt. Slowly, I turn away and begin to walk towards my car. The air is scented with night flowers. I breathe in their sweet scent and feel no pleasure. I get into my car and drive to my home.
We have moved homes every twenty years. It was hard to stop people from being curious about the man who never ages and the couple who never go out in the day. I put the window down and drive fast, very fast. The wind rushes into my face and that gives me no pleasure either.
I get home, and there are lights in some of the rooms. Some of the staff must have stayed. William died ten years ago. Sometimes I miss him. I go to the bar and pour myself a whisky. It gives me no pleasure.
“Can I get you something to eat?” Miriam, my housekeeper asks.
“No, thank you.”
“Goodnight, my Lord,” she says and withdraws quietly.
The phone rings, it is my youngest daughter, Virginia. “Hello Dad. How are you?”
“Fine. I’m fine. Are you all right?”
“I was thinking of coming and staying with you tonight,” she says.
“What about the kids?”
“They’ll be fine with their dad for one night.”
“Don’t do that sweetheart. I’m fine.”
“I think you shouldn’t be alone tonight.”
“I want to be alone. I want to think of your mother.”
“Oh Dad,” she whispers brokenly.
“Hey, we knew, remember. We knew she was on loan from the angels. We always knew we had to give her back and exactly how much time we had left.”
She sniffs. “I know, but…”
“I’ll be fine. You go and snuggle up with your husband. Every moment is precious.”
“Okay, Daddy. I’ll call you tomorrow.”
“I love you, sweetheart.”
“I love you too, Daddy.”
I put the phone down and almost immediately it rings again. It is my second son. He is the most caring of my sons.
“I’m coming over, Dad,” he announces.
“Why?”
“Because we can get drunk together and talk about Mom.”
“Maybe we do that another time. I’m tired today.”
“I’m coming over anyway.”
“Don’t do that, Christof. It would be pointless, I’m just about to go upstairs now.”
“Dad,”
“Yeah.”
“It’s going to be okay. We’ll work through this together as a family.”
“Of course, it’s going to be okay. Give the babies a kiss from me.”
“I love you, Dad.”
“I love you too.”
I leave the phone off the hook and go upstairs. I run a hot bath, then I put the envelope addressed to all my children with the letter I wrote many years ago on the pillow. I went to the cupboard to get the silver dagger I’d used to kill my family all those years ago.
It will stop my body’s ability to instantly heal wounds for long enough for me to achieve my ends. I put it on the edge of the bathtub and get into the steaming water. I close my eyes and lean back in the hot water.