‘Yes,’ she whispered. ‘Yes, I am. Because I love you and you don’t want to hear it. I have to bite my tongue and squash everything I’m feeling down inside and I hate that.’
He didn’t answer her. Just stared at her in silence while the couples around them moved slowly on the dance floor.
And suddenly she realised she’d done it again. She’d created something in her head out of nothing. When was she going to realise that just because she wanted something to happen it didn’t mean she could think it into happening?
She could want him to open up, but that didn’t mean he ever would.
And she could live with that or she could make a different choice.
A choice that didn’t need her to compromise everything that mattered to her.
Music flowed around her but all she was aware of was him and the huge pain pressing down on her chest. ‘I can’t do this...’ Her words were barely audible but clearly he heard her because his face seemed set in stone. ‘I can’t be with a man who is afraid to feel. And I can’t be with a man who doesn’t want to hear how I feel. I thought I could, but I can’t. I’m sorry.’ Mumbling the words, she pulled away from him. ‘I hope you find someone. I really do. I want that for you.’
Heart breaking, knowing she had to get away before she made a terrible fool of herself, she forged her way through the crowded dance floor, slipped through a side door into a carpeted corridor and walked slap into her father.
‘Hello, Selene.’
Her legs turned to water. Seeing him here was the last thing she’d expected. Since she’d been with Stefan she’d stopped looking over her shoulder. Behind her she could hear music from the dance floor, but this part of the corridor was empty and he was between her and the only exit. ‘I didn’t know you were here.’
‘So you’re still trying to make a fool of me?’
‘I’m not trying to make a fool of you. I’m just living my life.’
‘You came here in public with that man. He is setting you up in business. How do you think that looks to people? My biggest competitor sponsoring my daughter in her pathetic business venture.’
It was always about him, she thought dully. Always about his public image. Never about anyone else.
‘It has nothing to do with you and the only reason I had to ask him is because you wouldn’t help me. This is my business and it isn’t pathetic. It’s real. That’s why he’s helping me. He’s sees the potential.’
‘Potential?’
His laughter made Selene flinch.
This was what had drained her mother’s confidence. The consistent drip of derision that eroded like acid.
For the past month she’d lived in a protected bubble. She’d forgotten what it felt like to be put down all the time. She’d forgotten how it felt to watch every word she spoke and feel her way through every conversation. ‘He’s helping me because I have a really good business idea that is going to make him money.’
‘You’re still as naïve as ever. His only interest in you is as a weapon to strike me.’
‘Why do you always think everything is about you?’ The words flew from her mouth and she immediately clamped it shut, cursing herself for not thinking before she spoke. Once it had been second nature to do that but with Stefan she spoke freely about everything. Well, everything except one thing. The most important thing. And she couldn’t think about that now.
As always her father pounced on weakness. ‘Has he ever said he loves you?’
As always he picked the words designed to do maximum damage. To inflict maximum pain.
His timing was so perfect this time she even wondered if he’d somehow overheard their exchange on the dance floor. No. He couldn’t have done. If he’d been anywhere near the dance floor she would have seen him.
Or would she?
She’d been so wrapped up in her own misery she hadn’t been paying attention to anyone around her.
‘What Stefan says or doesn’t say to me is none of your business.’
‘In other words he hasn’t told you he loves you. And now you’re fooling yourself that he will say it given time.’