“Come in.”
I stepped inside and saw him sitting in a red armchair in front of the fire. He wore gray sweat pants and a black t-shirt. It was the only time I’d seen him in regular clothes, other than the evening he broke me out of Bones’s place. The shirt fit tightly against his powerful chest. His shoulders were outlined as well, along with the impressive muscles of his arms. A hardbound book was in his lap, and he set it off to the side when I entered. “Can we talk?”
He nodded slightly to the armchair beside him.
I took that as an invitation and sat down.
The table beside his chair held a glass of scotch. Square ice cubes slowly melted in the cup. He drank coffee in the morning, wine with dinner, and usually scotch in the evenings. It was a pattern I’d come to notice.
He refused to speak, his eyes looking at the flames in the hearth. When we didn’t see each other for a while, he closed off again, putting up his walls and refusing to let me in. Every time we came together, we had to start over.
“I’ve thought about your deal.”
He turned his face my way, listening to every word.
“I have some questions.”
He propped his elbow on the armrest and ran his fingers along his jaw. He gave another slight nod.
“Can you do whatever you want to me in exchange for a button? Do I have a say in it?”
He dropped his hand from his chin and placed it on the armrest. “Of course, you have a say in it. Ever since you’ve arrived here, you’ve had a say in everything. I would hope you’d appreciate that by now.”
His anger could be triggered by anything, even by harmless words. “So I can say no?”
“You’ve said no plenty of times in the past. Why would that change?”
“So under this agreement, I can say no?”
“Yes.”
“So we’ll never do something I don’t want to do?”
“Correct,” he said in a bored voice.
“Will you hurt me?” That was bound to be a part of the agreement. Even though he hadn’t hurt me up until that point, I knew he wanted to.
“Yes.”
“And do I have a say in that?”
He nodded.
Now that my curiosity had been quelled, I understood what I was getting into. The fact that I had some rights in the situation, had some control, made everything a lot easier. I could do this. I could do this three hundred and sixty-five times so I could go home. “Okay.”
He turned his gaze my way, the crackling flames reflecting in his eyes. The room darkened noticeably even though the flames burned hotter. His body tensed in desire, his hands anxious to grab me now that he had permission. “We have a deal?”
I refused to let myself think about it too hard. I had to do what I had to do to get out of there. I could work through it with a therapist when I was back at home. “Yes.”
***
We entered my bedroom, the place where I slept every night. The moment I said yes, Crow wanted to get down to business. He’d been eager for my answer even though he never showed it. Now, he couldn’t hold back his patience. He was ready to ignite.
“Can I make one request?” I’d come to love this room. I’d come to love my little window that looked over the fields. The couch sat next to the fire, the place where I read in peace.
He hadn’t touched me yet, but his arms hung impatiently by his sides. He gave me a dark look, annoyed that I had something to say.
“I love this room. Can we do this somewhere else?” It was my safe haven, the closest thing I’d had to a home. Bones used to take me in the bed I slept in, so I never felt safe. But this little room meant the world to me. I didn’t want to taint it with what we were about to do. Every time that door was shut, I wanted to know this was my space, and no one could take it away from me.
Crow must have understood because he didn’t ask for clarification. He accepted my words without question and walked out, moving down the hall until he entered an unoccupied bedroom. It was similar to mine, with a large bed and a beautiful window. It was a little bigger, with a desk in the corner. Even though it was clean, it seemed like it hadn’t been occupied in a decade. “Is this okay?”
“Yeah.”
He shut the door and strode into the room. He shoved his hand into his pocket and pulled out a button. He held it up for me to see before he flicked it on the bed. It was his first payment, the first dent in my massive bill.