“Why, Lucian? Why? You have all these reasons, but you won’t share them with me—”
“Because I will hurt you!”
The lash of his words silenced them both. It was ridiculous. Lucian wouldn’t hurt her. She was certain of it. It wouldn’t make sense for him to be so overprotective with her and then go ahead and do her harm.
“Lucian—”
“Stop. Before you go on assuming you know what I need, just stop. Do you know why Slade’s rude to you? Do you?”
She shook her head.
“Because he and I fucked the same woman for years. I don’t do vanilla sex, Evelyn. When I met you, I immediately picked up on your submissive nature, but I was a blind fool. You had me so enchanted I missed all the signs of your innocence. My God, I think about how I touched you in front of Jamie and I want to find my best friend and rip out his eyes. But it’s my fault because I let him!”
Her mind was still stuck on him and Slade fucking the same woman for years. Was it just one woman or several women and one just stuck around a little longer than the rest? Did they fuck each other? That would explain why Slade hated her, but she couldn’t imagine Lucian with another man.
He forked his hand through his dark hair and groaned. “I brought you into this situation and I never should’ve. How could you have possibly understood what you were agreeing to when you didn’t have the first clue about sex? I completely uprooted your life and now I feel responsible—”
“Shut up!” she shouted. Then in a calmer voice, “Just shut up. Don’t stand there and act like you are in any way accountable for my life. You don’t know the first thing about my life outside of this hotel. You couldn’t even cope with me spending one night in a shelter. What about all the nights I slept under a bridge, or on a bench? I was born in an alley, addicted to heroin. Did you know that? Of course not, because you’re too busy playing martyr to all my problems. Well they aren’t your problems! They’re mine! And I don’t need you to feel responsible for them anymore.” Pity was something she simply could not tolerate.
Scout stood on shaky legs. “I’m leaving. I don’t want you to follow me or have Dugan follow me or anyone else for that matter. We clearly don’t work together, because while I can overlook all your money and arrogance, you will never forget who I was or where I came from. I am nobody’s charity case, Lucian Patras.”
With a confidence she didn’t feel, she marched into the bedroom and found her bag. Furious that her hands were shaking, Scout yanked the zipper hard enough that it broke. Her shoulders collapsed at such simple, yet complete, devastation. The bag was the only thing in that world that she owned and she just fucking broke it. Fighting back the fallout that was sure to come, she quickly dropped her robe and pulled her sweatshirt over her head. Once she had her jeans on she grabbed her bag and held the broken zipper together as best as she could and walked to the front door.
Lucian looked as though he’d seen a ghost. Her limbs trembled as she faced him, but he wouldn’t meet her gaze.
“Thank you for everything. I hope you find someone who can make you happy.” Scout turned and left.
Part II
Lucian
Chapter 26
Alekhine’s Gun
A position in which the queen backs up two rooks
The door slammed and a piece of Lucian’s soul ripped away. Her words shredded him. It took everything he had not to bring her back, not to call the front desk and demand they hold her here. In one week’s time he’d come to think of Evelyn as his, yet he was incapable of fucking her again.
That look, that haunted, broken look in her eyes, he put that there. It was right for her to leave, but she wasn’t going back to her house or her life. She was going back to that goddamn shelter and the streets and she didn’t even have a fucking coat!
He walked to the window and stared down at the streets thirty-two floors below. Cars wove in and out of spaces as pedestrians mingled and raced to where they needed to be. Such monotonous bullshit.
How had she ever made it this far and come out less damaged than him? Well, that wasn’t true. She was notably more damaged since she became associated with him.
I was born in an alley, addicted to heroin.
Roaring in frustration, Lucian turned and swept everything off of the desk.
Stalking to the French doors, he pulled them wide. The blustery November air cut through his clothing as his feet stomped to the heavy railing. Leaning far over the edge until his muscles clenched in fear that he might plummet to his death, he gazed at the tiny people scurrying below. Looking for any sign of Evelyn’s dark hair luffing like a sail or that ridiculous pillowcase she called a bag, something inside of him crumbled when he saw nothing but strangers.