When you get to Arkansas, go to the bank, then find a library. They’re an amazing wealth of knowledge and will be able to get yourself more up to speed of current events. Your inquisitive mind will help you adapt quickly.
Check out colleges, I think you would enjoy it with your enthusiasm for knowledge. If you decide to give college a try, tell them you were homeschooled and need a placement test. Being a teacher, hopefully I prepared you enough. The one thing you’ll be lacking in is technology since our lessons never included it.
Whether you choose to stay or run, burn this letter. They can never know you found it and know the truth. This letter will make you an outcast forever, eliminating your freedoms. You know too much about The Society for them to let you go. Do you remember Rebecca Donovan, our neighbor from ten years ago? After her husband died, she wanted to leave and experience the outside world. She met with the Keeper to let him know. Only I knew about her talk with him. After the meeting, Rebecca died within a week.
I always wondered if that truly was a coincidence.
If you choose to leave. Make sure you lock this chest, put the key in my dresser and take the backpack with you. Put the house together just as it would be. Leave a note that says you cannot live here without me and have to join me in the light. They need to think you’re gone, Kenzie. They won’t want you out there, knowing about The Society.
As soon as you get in the woods, change into the jeans and T-shirt that are in this backpack. They will probably be a little big, but they will work until you can get more. The nearest bus station is a three-hour walk to the northwest. Use the stars like they taught you in class. Get rid of your clothes as soon as you can.
Leave no trace. Tell no one.
Get a bus ticket to Fayetteville, Arkansas where the bank is using the money in the backpack. After that, go on an adventure. I have no connections in Arkansas so you should be safe there if you decide to stay.
The choice is yours. Live your life.
Don’t stay out of fear or the need to be near our home. Kenzie, I‘ll be with you wherever you go. The world is a big beautiful place despite what you’ve been taught. Embrace it.
The things I showed you in secret and asked you to never tell anyone—dancing, painting, birthday parties, and stories—are from the outside world. If you decide to leave, you’re going to be frightened, but you’re strong enough, sweetheart.
I know you have more questions than I’ve given you answers to. You may never get all the answers you seek and I’m sorry for that. If I had the time to write everything out, I would have. But, I know you’ll adapt and be fine.
Remember, do what your heart tells you, not your mind.
I hope you know, even though my actions don’t necessarily make sense, that I love you with my entire heart. You and your father were my everything. Live your life Kenzie. Make your choices.
Be Free.
I love you forever and always.
Mom
First National Bank
Box # 158
College Avenue
Fayetteville, Arkansas
As I finished reading, my breaths were coming in and out nearly ragged as I tried to process everything quickly. There wasn’t much time to decide.
The sun was almost gone and the routine of burning the candle at my bedroom window came to the forefront of my mind. We were to light a candle that burned anywhere for two to ten hours every night until the flame died out. It signified that our time here on Earth was limited and to always focus on the flame burning as you never knew when it could vanish. I raced down the ladder, abandoning my letter on the floor. I made it to the drawer and calmly put the candle in the window and lit it solemnly like I did every night. One of the Watchers would walk down the street, making sure everyone had their candles out. I stood there like I always did and watched the flame dance for a couple of minutes, imagining two figures dancing. One evening, as the last of the sun’s rays came through the attic window, mom showed me how to dance in the attic. I treasured those memories.
I took a step back and drew the window sheer down a safe distance from the flame. Turning away, I walked toward my bed. If someone was watching, they’d assume I was exhausted, which I was, and turning in from my day of grieving.
My mom is gone.
Every time I thought about it, my heart shattered a million times more. Now, I had the weight of the truth bearing down on me. I still wasn’t sure if I fully comprehended the consequence of what my decision would entail. The unknown scared me. I was running out of time to decide.
Did I stay or go?
Did I choose to be free or confined?
Did I leave the only place I knew as home?
FOR ALL THE messages and e-mails regarding Bane … thank you! Without them, this story would not have been written. I always tell my family I have the best readers in the world. Thank you for all the love and support you show. It’s immensely appreciated.